How to not be awkward?

Awkwardness means a lot of things. I think it would helpful for you to say more about what what exactly makes your interactions with acquaintances awkward.

That being said, I think that regardless of the exact cause, you need to stop thinking that you are so awkward because you are probably not. I used to think of myself as a pretty damn awkward kid. And think this self awareness of being awkward made it worse because then I spent way too much time trying to analyze and self monitor for awkwardness instead of just putting effort into the social interaction. Secondly, I think you probably just need practice. At least in my case, because I felt i was so awkward, I avoided having to spend too much time interacting with people outside a close group of friends. Being socially competent is a skill and you can practice it. By avoiding social interaction I just made it worse.

And you know what, the last thing to do is to embrace the awkwardness. Maybe even if you do all that you can not to be awkward, you are still a little awkward -- so be it. If you master your awkwardness and own, the confidence that you will have can sort of counterbalance it.

 

Well, I may not be able to give the greatest advice, but I can tell you what I try to do. I am a very awkward individual aswell, but I am getting to be a lot better with it. I am still awkward, and I am sure I still look awkward, but working on not caring what people think really helps. I am very conscious of other people, but I try to constantly push myself to do things that I don't want to, because of how it will make me look. I am a horrible singer, awkward dancer, and ver self connscious how of I look. But, I try to do these things. I work third shift, and I get in and out of a truck and that has helped. I listen to headphones and I actually really enjoysinging and dancing, despite my lack of ability. So I do it. I know it probably isn't common for anyone to even see me, buit I don't care if they do.

So my advice would be to push yourself. Start off small, get comfortable with yourself, by yourself. I never used to even dance alone, despite wanting to. Then gradually do things around people. Just smile, know you are you and nothing matters. Smile like you don't care. It may not work, but it seems to be helping me. On another note, Michael Cera is very awkward, at least he looks it, and he is quite dreamy to me. lol

 

Oh geeze, sorry I don't have any advice but I too am a very awkward person. At one point someone told me that they had asked how I was doing to one of my aquantances, and that person said, "I don't know, still awkward..." guess its obvious to other people too.
It's so annoying being awkward!

 

I actually have the exact same problem. Mine may even be worse than yours is. I can't talk to new people and i'm extremely shy in social situations.

 

Guarantee that you're really just overthinking your own awkwardness, I do the same thing. If you think less about it then it will stop be a problem, that is all.

 

Wow, Stumbe along, you're awesome. Thank you so much for being genuine. Even though some people think I'm not awkward, I feel like a total herb most of the time; walking funny, awkward conversation, stomach grumbling, funny faces-the whole nine yards. I tend to be super self-conscious. But, as I've gotten older, I've gotten better. Most of us just want to be loved. Just keep being genuine; if people knew you, they would love you. What you feel is not who you ARE and let people know you more and more, some will love you, some won't and that's ok. It's a risk, but its worth it. I also really dig all the other posts on this. Peace man, love ya bro, me

 

I turn 42 next month. And I STILL can't look people in the eye (or even face) when I talk to them. It's just how I'm built. But I found if I just TELL people stuff like that - "you'll sort of notice that I don't really look at you much when I talk to you. Nothing on your end - it's just I've got a bit of a hang-up about looking at people when I talk to them" - they accept it. They realize that people have quirks and whatnot, and if I sound like I've got no problem with them, then other people tend to respond the same way.

Lex

 

Announcing you have tourette's, or even saying "Hi, I'm SA and I'm very awkward", isn't really what I'd suggest. Because doing so makes it the dominate feature of your personality. And I'm assuming you have more to offer somebody than your klutziness (and I'd like to think I do, too ). It's something you bring up during the "getting-to-know-you" process. After you start the conversation, after you're settling in to things. I've brought it up with maybe a few strange looks (I think - I wasn't looking at them!), but no apparent change to the conversation line.

Lex

 

I completely sympathize- I used to be a lot more awkward around people than I am now, and I still tend to feel uncomfortable around people I don't know very well. My advice is to push yourself a little at a time, to set goals like introducing yourself to one new person a day or to make eye contact every once in a while during a conversation. Since it sounds like you're feeling a lot of anxiety during social situations, not just awkwardness, you might also want to talk to a therapist. That might help you clarify what exactly you think your problems are and how you could work on them.

 

I am extremely self-conscious, and very competitive as well. I also often hold myself lower then other people, though I constantly try to strive to be better and prove that I am better then everyone. I know I have more self-awareness then others, and when it comes to intelligence, most of the people I see I'm not too worried about. I kind of carry an arrogance and low self-esteem. As I said before, it comes to pushing yourself all the time, and not caring so much what others think. But eye contact is different. There is a lot of things going on when you make eye contact. For me, I have to keep it in my head that I am at equal with whoever I'm talking to. Different in many ways, but no less of a person. Dominate the eye contact. Its an odd word to use, but its true. Every now and then I get someone that makes it weird and won't stop making eye contact, but most people don't do that.

Sorry if this post seems very odd, but I was hoping to explain where I was coming from.

 

I'm extremely awkward as well, I didn't talk until a very late age and I'm 21 now and still have trouble starting up, or holding conversations. However whenever I make some comment about being awkward to my friends they say I'm not that awkward at all. You may not be as awkward as you think you as you think. You've probably heard that a million times, but try not to think about your awkwardness so much, and even though it can be super hard, try not to care so much what other people think. If you have trouble on the phone, maybe try rehearsing what you want to say before hand, if you are uncomfortable looking people in the eye, starting trying to do it for short periods of time while holding a conversation. Hope this helps, I wish you the best of luck with everything.

 

I feel pretty bloody awkward a lot of the time too.. if I go to the store and buy something, I hate making eye contact with the clerk and will stare at the counter or the floor lol.. I think a lot of people are awkward, even moreso with all the technology and anti-social outlets we have these days, there just isn't as much social interaction. Awkwardness stems from us thinking we have to act or be a certain way.. some days these thoughts invade me more than others, and on those days I feel more awkward. I doubt anyone else notices these shifts in my self consciousness though. What people say here is true - be yourself, be genuine and try not to over think it - we are all special in our own right lol