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I'm not to sure what my mom thinks about me being Bisexual.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Menaki-Neko, Dec 28, 2011.

  1. Menaki-Neko

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    I came out to her just recently, but I'm not sure what she thinks about me. She's trying to tell me that it's just a confusing time and that I should "explore" my feelings for boys. She told me that she would be fine with it, but I'm not too sure right now about what she thinks.
     
  2. MommaFrog

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    Well, my mom still likes to call it a phase, and Im 21. I think she loves you and is kind of in shock. I think perhaps you should allow her time to process everything. Try not to push her or rub it in her face, but also do NOT ignore the fact that you have told her.
     
  3. IanGallagher

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    I think it depends on age of coming out, unsure how old you are - but if you're young say 15/16 your parents might think you're just going through a phase because they think you're still very new at this. Despite how ridiculous we all know that is. I mean, I wanted to dance with a cute guy when I was seven years old. It happened at the same time girls caught my interest as well. Not something in addition to. Lately when I came out and my Dad thought it was a phase - I just told him that I liked it when the quarterback took his shirt off during gym class back in high school - eight years ago. That really read loud and clear that this wasn't a phase because phases don't last that long. Depending on how long you've known, go back to the best and earliest example you can think of - that usually serves as a red flag that you're obviously bi and there's no way you could be otherwise.
     
    #3 IanGallagher, Dec 28, 2011
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2011
  4. biAnnika

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    I actually don't detect judgment in what you told us she said...certainly not necessarily.

    Yes she loves you. Yes, it sounds like she is very supportive of you exploring your sexuality. Those are both wonderful things, and you should pause to appreciate that.

    But if this is the beginning of your exploration of sexuality (and especially if you are young...meaning pre-career), then it *is* a somewhat confusing time, generally speaking. You could be gay, you could be bi, you could be particularly open-minded with certain fantasies...lots and lots of possibilities. Witness the many people on here who assumed they were straight/gay only to discover after a longterm relationship that they are in fact bi/gay/straight. We simply don't understand ourselves perfectly, and our understanding of ourselves shifts and changes over time.

    This doesn't mean that "it" is a phase, and it doesn't assume that she thinks you'll go back to being straight eventually, or realize that you're actually gay. All I hear is "take your time and explore, and I'll accept you however things work out." As advice, it sounds perfectly good. And as support from a parent, I think many people here would be terribly envious (my partner included).