So long story here: I am 18 years old, and I am gay. I'm out to my parents, friends, and about five members of the faculty at my school. I go to an all-boys Catholic school, so it's definitely been a struggle for me to find my identity and I was suicidal/depressed especially at many times during my sophomore year. I haven't been bullied at all, but I was never truly able to be myself. I played a couple sports (basketball my freshman and sophomore year and baseball all four years including two years of varsity baseball) and I was always able to "fit in" very easily. On the other hand I was incredibly lonely and isolated, and I never had anyone close to me because I never trusted anyone. At the same time nobody ever would suspect I was gay. Everybody I've told has been incredibly supportive. So here's the dilemna. I'm going on a school retreat, and basically it serves a place where students can share their struggles and how they overcame them. As a group leader, I would be able to read my speech in front of everybody on the retreat. I'm thinking about sharing my story about my struggles in accepting myself and how I was able to deal with the pain and the dark times(as almost everyone on this site knows) and how I overcame it and worked my way into dartmouth college so I could get myself out of the environment and the homophobic environment. I would be essentially coming out all the way. The thought of it scares me to death, but it also excites me. I'd like some input from anybody who's come out and the pluses and minuses of coming out to EVERYONE at the school (I would be the first openly gay person there). In a way, I feel as though it's important for me to get my story/struggle out to help other people but I'm not entirely sure yet. Thanks so much in advance for any advice!
If you feel that you're up to it and that its right for you, then do it, I say. If not, don't. I commend you on your courage- I could never put it in speech ever.
Are you totally out yet? What is it like initially, and how long does it take for everyone to kind of get used to the idea? Thanks for responding btw
I am not totally out. I'm actually pretty closeted still. About... I'm not actually sure how many people I've told, but its about maybe 10? So I can't help with that sorry.
In my opinion, it really is all up to you. Coming out to the entire school has a variety of consequences such as physical or verbal abuse by strangers or setting the road in which other people can also come out. It definitely takes a lot of courage to do what you want to do. However, you must always take caution in everything you say or do and if you believe that telling everyone your story will be helpful to not only yourself but also to others, then it sounds like a good plan.
