well let me start out by saying that i am still in the closet and currently in cosmetology school..well in school today one of my friends wanted me to go to a gay club with her and her two gay friends so that she wouldnt be the "only straight one" at the club (ironic right? ) but anyways so i said i would and when our other friends asked what we were going to they started saying things like "thats f*cked up" and "why would u want to go to a gay club??" aand that turned into the whole lesbian topic and they were saying things like "i dont want to go to a gay club cuz i have short hair and that means chicks will hit on me" and "thats why i wear a lot of makeup so i dont get mistaken for a lesbian" and then continued to talk about this girl that used to go to my school that is now dating a girl (used to date men)..saying how she probably liked every girl in school and that shes a big lesbian (which shes not she claims shes bi) and when i said she wasnt gay, shes bi the girl said "no, shes a lesbian cuz shes dating a girl right now, if she were dating a man she would be straight"..i was so aggravated, annoyed, downright pissed off that they were so ignorant and closed minded and it makes me glad i never came out to them..even tho im in the closet i still dont understand why its necessary to say such things...am i overreacting?...i mean they make homophobic comments all the time..but this was just ridiculous..sometimes i feel like im just too emotional..and that people that are out of the closet dont get that angry when they hear comments like that..does this aggrivate others as much as me?..sorry for the length..i needed to rant haha
You are not over reacting in my opinion! Those girls are not even trying to understand anyone else's situation
It would upset me too, however, they may be ignorant and that just means a lack of understanding. And a lot of ignorance is usually coupled with fear. I think it's reasonable for you to be upset, I would be too, but also cut them some slack, you might eventually have other conversations one-on-one and be an agent of change in their lives.
First of, welcome to EC! I don't think you are overreacting. What they said is very insulting and you have all the right to be upset. That being said, like Sunsetting mentioned, you have to understand that people are mostly homophobic due to ignorance and nothing else. As hard as it can be, sometimes impossible, its important to not let every single comment affect you and try to explain to them how what they are saying is insulting. Once you are out of the closet then comments like these become way easier to handle because then you can actually do something about it. You don't have to stay silent and you don't have to explain yourself to anyone. Also, you won't be hearing those comments from people that you care about so its much easier to simply brush them off. One of the main reasons why I came out
