He always yells at me wwhenever I do something he doesn't really like! I'm on my phone in the car, not driving it, and he yells at me because I "should be focussing on what he's doing so I can learn to drive". What the hell? HOW THE HELL DOES THAT WORK IDIOT! He yells at me at home and it upsets mum, but he doesn't give a shit! He makes her cry and the asshole says "Oh what's your problem?". HE IS THE BLOODY PROBLEM! And then he denys ever yelling, even while he is yelling! How does that work? I'M SICK OF THE IDIOT!!! "Stop being a girl" he always says. I AM A FUCKING GIRL! I CAN'T TELL YOU BECAUSE YOU WOULD YELL AT ME MORE AND I CAN'T STAND THE YELLING!!! ---------- Post added 12th Jan 2012 at 09:40 PM ---------- Because of him I'm hurting myself. AGAIN. I had finally stopped but tonight I started again. Great. ---------- Post added 12th Jan 2012 at 09:41 PM ---------- I had finally stopped hurting myself. But tonight thanks to him I started again. Bloody hell. ---------- Post added 12th Jan 2012 at 09:42 PM ---------- Ignore the double post. I thought I erased the first one by mistake.
Oh sweetie, please stop hurting yourself. Your pain is real, you don't have to have marks on yourself to prove it. You'll be away from home before you know it. He knows it too, he knows his total loss of control over you is imminent and he's angry about it. I wish I were in Australia so I could give you hugs and tell you everything will be OK.
Aw, that sucks. I feel so sorry for you. If you feel like confronting him about it, then tell him how you feel when he's not yelling, and make sure he knows that you're not going to let him carry on. But its up to you whether you do that - it really depends on your situation. It may just make things worse. Also, tell him that associating your actions with a girl's is sexist.
Here's a big virtual hug. It's too bad that we can't choose our parents. Your pain mental pain is real but you shouldn't make it physical, too. That will give you TWO problems to deal with instead of one. Mental abuse can sometimes be worse than physical abuse. Because you are in school, you might have help from a counselor at your school. Get help from somewhere. Importantly, don't let his treatment of you get into your head and make you believe his lies about you. YOU are a wonderful person. My mother was raised by an abusive step-mother. It changed her by making here determined to be the opposite of what her stepmother was. My aunt just got bitter and angry. You can learn to be a more nursing person because of him. And also learn to avoid those kinds of relationships for yourself. Love to you. I wish I was in Australia to give you a hug and encouragement personally. Tracker
Thanks everybody for the support. When I hurt myself I whip my wrist wih my watch (not the metal part). It hurts like hell, but that's what I want. I would hug you guys back if I could.
I'm so sorry to hear this, I hope you can find the inner strength to not hurt yourself and that it gets better!
"Relax, God is in Control" - The words of my 20% wool, 80% acrylic hat that was made in Bangladesh. I know one of the hardest things to do is keep your temper when someone irrational is exploding at you, but whenever you get that really, really, really, small voice of consciousness in the heat of your rage, try to grasp that and just walk away. 'course that's really hard to do, eh. But I'm golly sorry about your situation. But just like I say when I feel on the brink of a melt down: 'Relax, God is in Control'. It doesn't matter what we are, I KNOW with a fiery certainty that God loves all of us on here, and will look out for us, you just gotta reach out. I'm not tryin to preach to ya or nothin, but that's always an option
(*hug*) Hope things get better real soon! No one should have to go what you're going through. It gets better!
Don't do anything stupid. It's hard, I know- but please, don't do anything stupid. Please. Think of the people who care about you. That's what I do when I feel bad and tempted to do something stupid. I have photos of my loved ones and friends and I look at them and think about them and happy memories. Just... don't do anything stupid...
I'm so sorry for what you're going through too. I don't know if you do any journaling, but if you don't, you might want to give it a try. Even if you're the only one who reads it, it may help to pour some of your emotions into a journal - or poetry. Is he ever in a quiet, good mood? If so, is he approachable then? Maybe if you wrote a sincere letter to him about the hurt you're feeling, he would stop and think before going off. I don't know though. If it hits him wrong, it could make him go off again. Is there a hotline you could call when things get bad? Do you talk about all this with your mother when he's not around? Sorry, I'm just shooting in the dark here. Just some things to consider.
