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Came out to mom

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Daisy1, Jan 14, 2012.

  1. Daisy1

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    I told my dad last week and he told my mother today or yesterday.

    Mom just called me. She supported me, but then kept suggesting that I'm not really gay. She said that it could be that I wasn't that attracted to my ex, or that I just have a low sex drive in general, or that I'm just confused. She kept saying, "I don't think it (being gay) is that black and white."

    I interrupted and said, "I'm pretty sure about this," and she kept telling me to keep an open mind. Then she said that "of course, your dad and I are fine with gay people and you're always welcome to bring dates home."

    Technically, I guess, it went ok, but for some reason I'm really upset. I felt like she was saying: "we're ok with gay people, but we don't really want you to be one of them, and don't believe that you are."
     
  2. J Snow

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    I think over all that was a pretty good coming out experience. You should be proud to have parents that didn't flip out. I'm glad everything went well (*hug*)
     
  3. silverhalo

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    I can totally understand why you feel upset by this but try not to worry too much it is quite possible that your Mum is still coming to terms with it, im sure she will accept it and be supportive if just given a little bit of time.
     
  4. Chip

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    Your mom is somewhere between denial and bargaining. Remember you've known this for a long time, but she's just getting used to it, and is going thorugh the five stages of loss (of your identity as a straight person)... denial-anger-bargaining-grief-acceptance.

    All in all, it's clear she wants to be supportive but is having a hard time accepting it. Give it a bit of time and she'll be fine. :slight_smile: