I have two big stresses that I need to talk about about ,but I'll speak on one for now...and that is...girls. Seriously, it's not as if I consider myself a magnet, not in the slightest bit, but I have a big issues dealing with girls. I mean, what dod you do with a bunch of girls who are attracted to you but don't know you're gay? Just yester day at my graduation party, two girls were glued to me the entire time give eachother looks as if they were fighting for my time, one started talking to me about how great it would be if we were married. I'm a fairly shaped, light skin black-latino male that basically has unintentionally lured a few girls along the way and I have know idea what to do with them. Meanwhile, everyone in family, grandparents and all, and all the church ladies are talking about: "Why haven't you picked her up yet?" "Come on playa make your move..." "Michael, you better snatch her..." "That's a fine young lady over their...she's trying to talk to you." Any of you guys have on dealing with girls. I don't want to make some dumb move because I still want their friendship and don't want them to despise me. And on the other hand, there the issue in my Baptist chruch where every family tries to court any fine (by fine, basically meaning decent) young man with their daughters, cousin, or niece. It's pretty hard to go unnoticed.
I just act oblivious and play the "I'm-apparently-smart-so-I-don't-know-anything-about-girls" game. Actually, come to think of it, it works pretty well sometimes.
The girls are probably interested in you because you are single and you are non-threatening to them (ex. not constantly hitting on them). Girls love the challenge of trying to catch a boy and since in this case there are several girls, it makes you look more attractive to them and it makes their attempt to win you over even more difficult, thus more inticing. It would not be fair of you to allow this chase to go on much longer. Although you didn't ask for the attention, now that you have it you must react to it. I would be honest (to a degree) with them- say that you are not ready to date anyone right now because you are still very young and you want to enjoy being single at the moment. Girls react much better to the truth than they would if later they found out that you were gay, and that you allowed them to waste their time on you. By telling them this up front, the girls that still want to have a friendship with you will stick around and probably become very good, close friends. They will be happy that you told them your position, so that they can feel free to think of you only as a friend and move on.
none of the above, i acttually went out with the girl for a while cuase i affraid to come out and i dont want to hurt her feeling
Usually, I just play along with them... HER: Lets get married!! ME: Lets. Just joking around like that. I don't take them too seriously when they say stuff like that. Sometimes walking in the halls I will link arms with them...just act like friends basically. Friends can do that still without getting into too much. But when they start getting too close, like wanting an actual relationship, that is when I think you have to draw the line and tell them. __________________
Okay, I'm humble, but I guess I can't be humble to convey this, so I will sound a bit cocky in stating this: I tried being with arms wied open and being heart-warming and compassionate to all, which is my nature. Because of that, my nicknames through high school were huggybear and grandaddy (d/c my love, hugs,and wisdom were what some referred to as that of a grandpa). There's one problem, (this will sound cocky...), but I am somewhat attractive. For those of you that know music, my personality and style verbally, romantically, and clothing wise is pretty much the same emitted by the rapper Common and singer Musiq Soulchild. One reason why some people have guessed that I'm gay is that it's pretty unsual for them to see a brotha with 3 or 4 girls straddled on his arms and simply call them friends. And also that fact that every girl in my school, which I'll note is only 120 people, calls me a close friend, yet I've never touched any of them. It's seems that if I continue with just having this big heart it will just end me up in the corner againn with a girl trying to unbotton my shirt, and that happened once, one time too many. :turn of the pompous meter: I hate talking about myslef like that, but really, that's the point it's at and I really need a serious suggestion because as of now, I have two friends, that I want, but both think they're/want to call me their boyfriends. I don't want it that way!
Well im supposed to be on hiatus, i know lol but ill make an exception because this thread particularily interests me. Well i voted choice #3 (string them along) but i also do come out to most of them (choice #2), but thats just because im coming out globally (well school-kinda-global lol) next year. I wouldnt recommend choice #2 unless your prepared to deal with the worst case senario of her going absolutely vengiful and tellling any and everyone. Choice three is usually the best choice i find....you're not doing anything wrong, you're just keeping her hearts from being broken....eventually she'll get bored or take a hint and find another....if not then i pop in choice #2.
I just play dumb and joke around like chrisG and nk1114.. it works for me, eventually they get tired of "the game". But it sounds like you have a much greater problem on your hands.
Its not that difficult, girls dont like to be rejected but, they will understand if you say "IM NOT INTERESTED!".. just dont shout it like i did...
