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switching colleges: advice

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by peanutbutter, Jan 18, 2012.

  1. peanutbutter

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    Location:
    West Palm Beach, Florida
    What I like:

    Therapist
    most professors
    Friends
    Christian fellowship
    affordable (I am paying.my own way) I took out 1,000 in loans ended up winning a scholarship
    small town
    Mountains

    What I don't like
    new england -- to cold
    close to home Connecticut
    I cant be "out "
    to tiny of a town not enough to do
    Need a car to do everything
    not warm enough
    I want a second.job besides work study
    I miss the city


    What to do. I have better opportunities Bc its so small. Cheap so I can afford grad school and beyond. I want to be away from Connecticut. Massachusetts is not far enough. I hate how cold it is. Not much to do that may just be Bc I am taking 17 hours. Everything closes at 10pm. I love it though
    the academic. Dean.loves me and they will work.super hard to help you pass.

    Its too cold and.no Baptist pentecostal. Church's like in California or the south. I love church it makes.me happy and being able to take public transportation to work at youth reds means so much.vi love the inner city.



    Advice?
     
  2. jlg65

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    Messiah College in PA is really nice. Its a Christian school and close to the capital of Harrisburg. I live real close. The winters can get cold but nothing to bad. It a great school.
    Regent University is also a great Christian college in Virgina Beach. Great climate! Great school!
    Im not sure what the tuition is on these but I've been to both campuses and loved them!
     
  3. theatergeek101

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    ahh, come on. CT aint that bad haha.
     
  4. Marlowe

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    You might feel a bit stifled, but don't underestimate the importance of the friends you have made. It takes a few years to cement those relationships. And hopefully you will remain in contact with those friends after college. In my experience it is the times you have with friends and the relationships you cultivate that are one of the most valuable things you willt take away. Not to say that this won't happen, but it is harder as an older (your age suggests to me that you will be a junior next year) transfer student to make new friends and it is harder having only been a sophmore to stay in touch with your friends. Secondly there are other costs to transferring -- not all credits will transfer, so it may take longer/ cost more, learning the new environment, finding a new therapists. Getting to know professors, etc.

    When I look at your list of reasons to stay it seems very compelling -- that you have found a place that meets your social and intellectual needs. On the other hand, your lists of complaints doesn't seem that strong. Mostly, they are the sorts of complaints you will have no matter what college you go to. They may not be the same but they will be of the same sort of magnitude. It rains too much. The city is too noisy. Public transit is unreliable and difficult to use. The campus is too big and isn't unified. Maybe you can get a job but not as much financial aid. Happiness is impacted by the big things, not the small ones.

    The only thing on that list that is compelling for me as a reason to transfer is that you don't feel as though you can come out, and I am curious as to why this is. Carefully thing about this because if the reasons are more personal than situational, then going to another campus won't help. On the other hand, if you do feel that you want to come out and that it would be bad for you to do so here, then you have some thinking to do.

    Basically, I think transferring is a big decision and that you need to think more carefully as to the reasons you want to transfer, and what is driving this desire. That being said, I have a friend who transferred out after his freshman year at my school and has done quite well for himself, but I think my school really wasn't a good fit for him intellectually.
     
  5. peanutbutter

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    you have no idea what part I am from and or how many of my 8 aunts and 3 uncles and 64 cousins live there. It's just too much family and personal influence.

    ---------- Post added 20th Jan 2012 at 01:06 AM ----------

    I do love my college. :slight_smile:It's too small yes but I love that part sometimes. There is not enough to do in the community but that does not mean I can't work on getting a car and a license. I make friends pretty easily. I can't be out, but I can't even be out at home, grad school is in two years, ha! Not to forget about summer employment.
    I am academically challenged and opportunities for me to study abroad are better because our school is so much smaller. It can be harder.

    I also am BI Polar :eusa_doh:and glad I read your response. I was semi-manic :bang:so your response was helpful and insightful not to mention i was fighting with my twin. I leave for school on Saturday I am pretty sure when I get to campus I'll forget and go back to normal.

    I guess grad school I apply to live in a larger city at university. thanks!

    ---------- Post added 20th Jan 2012 at 01:06 AM ----------

    I'll check it out for grad school. Tx!
     
  6. dreamcatcher

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    As someone who is a transfer student, I would suggest not doing it. I lost an entire semester worth of credits from transferring and had to even repeat certain classes. Like Marlowe said, you seem to have a lot of good reasons for staying. However, if you do decide to transfer, you need to pick the school that you want to go to carefully.
    Some suggestions....
    -If you can, avoid transferring in the middle of the year (spring semester). I did that and it's a lot more difficult to meet people that way since there is a lot less people and generally less orientation activities for new students.
    -You said you're in a small town that has a christian fellowship right? That means I'm assuming you go to a small school. If so, you might be wary of transferring to a bigger school. It's a lot easier to get lost in a bigger school if you're a transfer student and not used to the huge environment. It also get a lot harder to get to know teachers and competition for certain opportunities as well as work study is rough. This might impact you if you want to go to grad school as you will need to get to know professors well to write letters of recommendations.
    -If you decide to transfer to a public school with a lot of instate students, it might also be harder to meet people there because they tend to get kind of cliquey since many of them went to the same high school and what not.. If you could, I would recommend going to a school with less instate students as in my experience, the students there tend to be more open and welcoming of others.
    -Financial aid might be tricky if you're a transfer student. Some schools give you less money as a transfer student and you have to make sure to solve any financial issues you may have with your previous school.
    -Finally, if you do transfer, live on campus! I wish I could have done this but due to expenses, I live with my parents. It's a lot easier to meet other people if you live in the dorms than if you lived in an off campus apartments. You also get to feel more connected to the environment. Also, if you can, get involved in the organizations (I've tried doing this but sadly the ones I want to join always interfere with my schedule :/)

    Anyways, I hope I didn't scare you away! My transfer experience hasn't been good but that doesn't mean yours won't be.
     
  7. peanutbutter

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    I attend a small public college. Almost everyone went to high school together there are 3 ppl from connecticut (me), a hand full from vermont (100), new york (200) and one from colorado. everyone else boston many of the seniors remember the freshman as they were graduating from high school.. we have about 1,300 student (I believe less) and it's interesting. my friends are not apart of the drama but it is there you can see it. i just wish it was small where I can get around and chill at least for late night church events. all the restaurants closes at 10pm. I love it though. I'm excited for grad.

    The good thing is I made the deans list and I believe because it is a small school that made it easier. My high school had about 200 students so this is big in a way to me.

    grad school will be a university so it's will be huge!! 2 more years..