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Problems with seperation

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by EnglishTeenS, Jan 29, 2012.

  1. EnglishTeenS

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    I've recently been thinking over my actions today if I do have sever problems with separation or is it all in my head? I was wondering if anyone could give me any tips over how to get over these feelings or just let myself cry it out?

    This morning I dropped my boyfriend (6 months and we see each other everyday) to the airport to go to his home country for 3 weeks. I'm excited for him as he will get to see his family and old friends, I just can't help the feeling of missing him so much that I cry every time I think about it. As soon as I walked to my car to drive home I started crying, I don't know if I am over reacting or just having problems with separation ...

    We both have blackberry's so we communicate via BBM quite frequently even if he is abroad, but I can't help but cry and feel sad ... even though I know he is coming back in 18 days. (I was also like this when I went on holiday for a week...)

    I think I should also mention I am a single child so maybe it is something there that I am not used to someone being in my life 24/7 ...

    Please, any advice at all would be appreciated. All I seem to be doing is crying today :eusa_doh: Maybe tomorrow i'll be over it? Haha :lol:
     
  2. jlg65

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    Wow! You must really love him! That's amazing! Its awesome that you have someone you care for that much! It will get easier as you spend more time away from each other, it just takes some getting used to. Just remember, he's coming back! And he is only a phone message away! I would say just cry it out. Once you get some of that emotion out, you should feel a little more stable. Spend the evening catching up with a friend or something to keep your mind off him for a bit. Call him before you go to bed and tell him you love and miss him. It will make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside and you will sleep nice and sound knowing he loves you too! Good luck :slight_smile:
     
  3. Vesper

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    There's no shame in crying. After all, you do care about him deeply, and you two haven't had to go through a separation this long before. Just allow yourself to cry it out, and keep in touch with him throughout these 18 days, and you'll be just fine.

    I'm an only child as well, with my parents working overseas, so I can relate to these feelings as well. It can be pretty hard for me to separate from my parents each time I must leave them or they must leave me.
     
  4. Chip

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    It sounds like your reaction might be a little stronger than normal. It's not unreasonable to shed some tears while saying goodbye, but if you're constantly crying, that's probably an indicator that maybe you do have something going on that needs some attention. As jlg said, it's obvious that you love him deeply and that's great... yet you also need to be able to be independent and happy and self-sufficient by yourself, so that he completes you rather than your being so completely dependent, if that makes sense.

    If you have the resources to do so, I think perhaps talking to a counselor for a couple of sessions about this could be really helpful.
     
  5. JohnnyBoy

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    Your crying is totally justified. Every time Alex leaves, I cry. For the first 4 months of our relationship, my boyfriend and I spent everyday together, then he graduated and moved home (2 hours away from me). If we're lucky, we see each other every other weekend as I'm still busy with school. Communication is totally the key to this. Text, call, skype, etc, every time you think about him or want to share your feelings. This part of the relationship is where the test comes in as you won't be able to share special moments together.

    For my boyfriend and I, our separation has made us stronger. We love each other more than ever and we appreciate every moment we spend together now.

    Don't stop communication with him and don't follow temptation where it leads you. Your love will outlast anything and best of luck to you!
     
  6. EnglishTeenS

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    Thanks guy, I usually get like this and he knows it. I cried it out and I am all good now, yet missing him a lot :slight_smile:

    I just get like it a lot ... that's why I posted this thread hehe

    Thank you guys :slight_smile: