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Really really blunt sex question

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by parcimonieux, Jan 31, 2012.

  1. parcimonieux

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    As a disclaimer (if it matters), I'd like to point out that I'm not gay (call myself 80/20 on the kinsey scale). I'm what I like to call opportunistic. Nuff said, I hope.

    Anyway, my very blunt question is thus: I have a significant anal fixation. I enjoy giving anal sex to women and receiving anal sex from women and men. But, I have an issue that has come up in the past few years, and I truly hope this is not too much to ask... I'm very "regular" but it seems like the past few times I have been the receiver, I have poop issues. In the sense that the sex was excessively not "clean". Like in an unfun, run-to-the-bathroom-horrified-jump-in-the-shower kind of way. After the first couple times, I tried enemas (maybe not big enough?) and a couple tricks (soapy fingers, other things) my wonderful female partner suggested, all to no avail. I've tried adjusting diet and other physical tricks. Even when everything seems totally normal, the sex has been not-good-dirty. Thank *goodness* all this recent activity has been with her, because she is so understanding (also a serious fixation, so no stranger herself) but I am yearning to increase the participation of a male lover of ours. However, due to my ... eh ... issue, I'm shy and terrified of going to that next level with him.

    I have had great experiences with quite a few female lovers, and a couple male lovers (as a receiver; I'd say I'm way beyond normal on both ends for a straight guy) but up until this past year, this has never happened before in any of my history.

    I hope this isn't too much for this forum... ADMINS: if it is, please, delete/move and accept my apologies but seriously, try posting this on even a kink site. Not pretty, not helpful, not nice responses.

    Queer family, can you help?

    -P
     
  2. Lexington

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    Hard to say just from the info given. I'm assuming you haven't had any issues with your digestive tract away from the bedroom, or presumably you would've let us know. When you go without anal for, say, a couple weeks, everything seems OK?

    Perhaps our health expert KaraBulut can weigh in.

    Lex
     
  3. GoogieHowser

    GoogieHowser Guest

    what kind of enema are you using? if its one of those rinky-dink Fleet enemas, forget about it.

    you need a bladder type enema (nothing to do with your bladder, relax). you can fill those multiple times and even if you had an elephant's size stool up there, it will eventually get it all out and you'll be good-to-go. They should be available at Rite-Aide, Walgreens or other such drugstores.

    Here's what I mean:
    Enemas
     
  4. callahac

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    Could be your diet. I follow the primal diet and I am always clean as a whistle. Don't use enemas just take a shower and make sure to clean real well down there.
     
  5. insidehappy

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    i heard enemas were not really good for your body and you should only use them if a doctor recommends. i also heard that showering afterwards should be enough to get you clean of remnants of waste. also, is it true that if you use an enemas it could create small tears in your anal lining that you can't see which could be dangerous when having anal sex. this is off topic but anal sex (never had) just seems like it would hurt and that you would dislodge something in there or rip something inside one of your intenstines or anal tract/rectum? i know straights and gays do this but i just wonder is it really safe for you long term?
     
  6. seeksanctuary

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    Well you can't just shove any old thing up there unprepared and rummage around a 50 miles per hours, but for the average person, it's perfectly safe. Yes, it can hurt and you might bleed a bit if you don't prep properly, but eh.
     
  7. I've had the same problem before....no fun and super embarassing. I would guess the enema is the only way to go for certain...
     
  8. Ridiculous

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    The main problem with enemas is that they flush out the mucus that naturally coats the interior of the rectum and colon. This increases the risk of STD infection as the mucus is no longer there to act as a protective layer. The mucus also acts as a minor lubricant. They shouldn't cause cuts or abrasions in the lining - you are just using water after all. Full colonic irrigations have other possible problems involved, but these are much more intensive than a pre-sex douching.

    As for anal sex being physically unsafe, everybody routinely takes craps that are bigger and rougher than a penis, without lubricant, and don't damage anything. The only 'problems' with anal sex are getting past the anus - which is solved using lubricant - and STDS (which are a problem for any kind of sex) - condoms are used to prevent these. As long as you use lube and condoms and don't engage in extreme practices such as fisting then you won't have any problems.