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Lesbian help please...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jordash, Jan 31, 2012.

  1. Jordash

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    I only really want help from girls, but guys if you think you can help too, please dont hesitate to add your 2 cents. :slight_smile:

    So I was just wondering if any of you have ever thought you were moving to fast for your partner. Like you've had sex, but now your not sure what your girlfriend is thinking about your relationship? I kinda feel this way and I just want some personal input on it. :rolle:
    Stories of personal experiences would help a lot!
    Thanks! :slight_smile:
     
  2. silverhalo

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    Hey i havent felt this way but i can say if you are not sure what your girlfriend is thinking it is always best to just ask her, communication is always the key.
     
  3. Tiny Catastrophe

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    I agree with silverhalo and think you should just ask her what she's thinking. My relationships with girls have been rather odd. The first girl I was in a serious relationship with we took kind of slow and didn't have sex until the second time we were together but between that time I had "hooked up" with a friend (who I later dated as a rebound) but both of those girls were seriously mentally unstable and used me and treated me like absolute garbage and I always felt awkward doing anything with them. My current girlfriend and I waited a while before we took the step into sex and we're pretty open about our feelings so there was no question there. So now I'm going to repeat myself and say just ask her how she's feeling.
     
  4. Hot Pink

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    Just as the others have said, ask her. This is everything that relationships are about: communication. When you don't communicate with your partner, your relationship begins to die. Not to mention that feelings need maintenance to survive and continue growing. Physical affection will only get you so far in that respect.
     
  5. hml8

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    I agree you should defo ask her how she's feeling!
    My girlfriend and I got together cause we 'accidently' had a couple of 'one night stands' with each other! So I never had that is it moving too fast thing in terms of sex. But we live together at uni now and that was quite quick, we've been officially together for 22 months today, but it works cause we do a lot of talking about how we feel. :slight_smile:
     
  6. Rooni321

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    Dude that is SO cute :slight_smile:
     
  7. Ianthe

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    So you had sex just before New Years, right? And she's been acting standoffish since then, and was acting weird when you gave her that ring yesterday.

    You're going to have to just talk to her and ask what's going on. Make sure she knows it's okay if she isn't ready to be physical with you for a while.
     
  8. Jordash

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    Sound like Im just gunna have to suck it up and talk to her....
    I know I should be able to, but I don't want to mess up and lose this girl. I love her.
     
  9. silverhalo

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    You can say that to her, like 'I really like you and I dont want to mess this up, but I just want to make sure you feel the same way'..... or something like that.
     
  10. Koll

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    From a guys perspective:

    I totally get where you're coming from. I had sex with my first boyfriend, really before I actually met him (Because of the whole 'lets experiment!') Thing.

    If you ask me, yeah it did hinder our relationship a bit going from best friends, to lovers then a relationship..

    Needless to say he's no longer my best friend.. Or lover, for that matter.

    And with what everyone else said; Def ask her. Don't let these things go un-noticed.