meeting a stranger?

Absolutely not! Don't do it. It isn't for sure safe and you don't really know him. Play safe and with someone you know!
All the best! x

 

Lots of people have had great experiences with online friends/dating. Don't just drop him because you don't know him in person. However you do need to take some precautions...

Have you had a live video chat with him (e.g. Skype)? I advise against meeting anyone from online until you have done this, as it is really the only way to be sure that who are talking to is genuine.

Also rather than meeting him at his house, arrange to meet up in a public place such as a coffee shop; this way you can gauge him in person in a setting that is easy for you to leave if things don't go as you expected. You are putting a lot of trust in someone if you go into their house, so it isn't a good idea when you don't know the person. These are all just precautions for your own safety, which is the most important thing in these situations.

As for knowing whether someone is gay: you can't know for certain unless they tell you they are. There are cues you can use as a 'gaydar', such as eye contact, posture, mannerisms etc. but even with all of these you can't be 100% certain. If you don't want to ask someone whether they are gay, the best thing to do is to look for partners in a place you know people will be gay, such as a gay bar or gay sports club.

 

I wouldn't just jump into things so fast. People can get carried away when they meet someone new and think that person is so great when in reality, they don't know a whole lot about them. If you want to meet him in person, that's not a bad idea, meet him somewhere in public where people would be around. I wouldn't go meet him at his house as the first time of seeing him. Good luck with this but I strongly advise meeting him somewhere in public and not just going to his place right away.

 

i think you need to end communication with him because he only wants something sexual from you or possibly worse.

here's the thing...people that want to meet you and develop friendships and get to know and are also worried theirselves that you could be weird, crazy or not exactly what they want DO NOT invite you to their homes to meet you without ever having met you in real life before.

the fact that he is willing to skip these steps shows that is likely out to get sex from you or have you alone in his house and once again, you have never met this person. i know you are anxious to meet people but since you are asking this question, i will give you a list of things to watch out for when internet dating or dating in general:

1. if any man ask you to meet you at his house and you have not ever met in person yet, simply decline and then delete them or no longer talk to them anymore. they definitely have an agenda and it will not be good for you.

2. only meet someone from online if you have seen pictures of them, seen webcam live footage and have written down all their possible contact information (name, phone, meeting place, date you are going to meet them, location you are going to meet, time you left to meet them and any description about what they would be wearing...get this description so you know who it is when you meet them and also so you can write it down on a note and leave this information somewhere so that if somethign happens, someone can find you."

3. if you are under 18, do not meet anyone from online.

4. if you do meet someone from online, make sure to do #2 above and also to tell someone where you are going. "hey bff, im going to hang out with a friend at the mall " if you are out to this friend, then let them know exactly what is going on. if you are not out to this friend, make plans with them right after your date is supposed to end. that way, if you don't show up, someone will think it is suspicious

5. ONLY meet in public places on TURF that is familar to you. You ALWAYS make the suggestion on where to meet. do not meet somewhere that you are unfamiliar where to go, how to get there, or how to get the heck outta there if you need to. if they do not know where your suggested place is, and recommend someting of their own, do not settle only meet them somewhere mutually where you both are aware of the place.

6. great meeting places: restaurants, coffee shops. and stick to one location on the first date. sometimes people will say, "hey lets go somewhere else after this, why dont we take one car....NO. just decline and say thanks but i have plans with my best friend afterwards but we can hopefully hang out another time.

7. do not ride in a car with a stranger until you have developed a since of them being cool and youve developed some trust with them.

8. if people are showign you private parts on webcame before you meeet, you can pretty much guess what they will want to do when they meet ou

9. alwasy watch your drink. if you get up and leave the table to go to teh bathroom, do not drink the same drink again if you left it unattended. order another one. even if its water.

10. just be safe and have fun but this was not meant to scare u just giving you some practical steps to watch out for creeps.

 

let me school you to what players say:

"we can just watch movies and i have an extra room and we dont have to do anythign".....that translates to: "my plan is start making out with you once i get you to my house while we are "watching movies" and then have sex."

you're 19 and he wants to go out for drinks??? um, this is not a person for you.

also, he wants to hang oiut with you and two friends for a movies.....ok, so now you dont even know him really and now he wants the first time you all to meet to also be with two other people you dont know...

this is 2 hours from where you live so if some stuff goes down, you will be in a bad situation if you need to get out of there.

just leave this dude alone. he is inappropriate and i can assure you that he does not have your best interest to heart. if he did, he would say, "hey i know you're driving all this way and we havent' met so i can recommend a hotel for you and im willing to split 1/2 your room night and you can stay there and I can stay at my place just so you feel comfortable. if he had your best interest at heart, he would not be asking you to go out for drinks of which you are not old enough to "go out for drinks". he certainly would not be trying to get you to hang out like this.

he even has on his facebook, "when are you goign to come see me". this guy sounds weird or like a freak.

i know you want to meet people but this is not the one for you. you don't have to go to gay bars. you cna try a lgbt youth center and there are people your own age there.

or a reputable dating site . be cautiious. this doesn't sound good to me. just err on teh side of caution and do not go up to see that guy. period.

 

bro, i'm feeling caution about this. not a total red light, but definitely a deep yellow light.

just like people said above, skype first, if you meet, meet in a public place, let someone you know, know where you're going and if there is ANYTHING at all where you feel uncomfortable, just get out of this.

"come out for drinks & come stay the night at my place" when he doesn't know you makes me cautious.

just curious, how old is he?

 

here's something to consider: the bait you put out there determines what you are fishing for.

the age isn't the thing with the drinking, it's more that it lowers your judgment and he's very complimentary towards you. in a mild fashion, it sounds like he's grooming you. it doesn't mean you're not good looking, it just means he knows you're shy and might be taking advantage. however, i don't discount that he could still be genuine.

if he is shirtless in a lot of his pics, that's what he's putting on display and he's probably looking for something physical. if you put out there a balance of activities, friends, interests among shirtless photos, you're putting a good personality out there.

i've been in situations where people say i'm good looking and it feels good, only to find out that what they really want is me to respond physically to them so they feel good about themselves. i want something enduring and to know that a person really appreciates me from the inside out and not the outside in, you're a good guy and probably want the same.

how many dudes has he ever had sex with/fooled around with on the internet or in person?

maybe you can get together at a mutually convenient location between you two for lunch for a first meeting.