Hello! I'm not sure what to say exactly, but I feel like I need to say something or else I'll go mad. Long story short: I have a crush on a good (?) friend of mine who is also my roommate. I told her about this last week and, while she said she wasn't interested in a relationship because she would rather focus on schoolwork (though she is gay, too), she did suggest that we go see a movie that weekend. There were no movies that both of us wanted to see, so we decided to go to a concert today instead. Unfortunately, on Tuesday she said she thought she had too much homework and wouldn't be able to go. The problem: I can't shake the feeling that she never wanted to go in the first place, and this has upset me far more than it should. I went to the concert but left during intermission because I was afraid I would burst into tears in the audience. Also, while I consider her my best friend, I don't really know how she feels about me. Some days it seems like we're close friends; other days it feels like I'm just the annoying roommate. I'm terrible at reading people, both others and myself. I guess I'm wondering what I should do. I want to still be friends with her, but I also want this horrible feeling to go away. If nothing else I'm afraid it will destroy our friendship because I'm horrible at controlling my emotions. I know the post is kind of long. Thanks for reading it!
It all just sounds like speculating right now, so don't jump to conclusions until you know the facts. The next time you feel like something is wrong, take notice. Figure out if she really is pushing you away, or if its just your emotions playing tricks on you. If you want to salvage the relationship, then you have to start talking, or else your friendship could possibly be broken forever. If she really is a good friend, then she will be eager to keep you around. But if the bad feelings are more real than you thought, then it's time to let the relationship fade away.
Thanks, phospholipase. Turns out it was just my emotions playing tricks on me. I talked to her last night, and she said the last thing she wants to do is distance herself from me. Then this morning she suggested we watch some Star Trek episodes together tonight. It was obvious that she wants our friendship to continue just as much as I do. Emotions are fun, especially when you're not used to dealing with them.
