Usually I don't care about valentines day, but this year it really sucks. All my friends are with their boyfriends/girlfriends, and I'm stuck at home with no one. Obviously there are people out there who are doing the same exact thing, but I just hate it. I'm sick of being alone. And I find it odd that my friends have never once asked me about relationships. I'm not saying that I want to talk about myself all the time, but just once I would like someone to ask me why I'm not in a relationship. I mean I'm not out yet, but I feel like it would make it easier for me to tell them if someone would ask. I don't know. Maybe I'm just overreacting. But I haven't been doing good lately. Today I had to basically drop out of school because I can't afford to pay for it every month. I don't whats going on with me. I want to be more determined and motivated but I just stress out over the money. I want to be in school but right now it impossible for me. I have a shitty job that doesn't pay me enough. I feel like I need to get away from everything for a few days. I hate being stressed out, but so does everyone else in the world. I'm really disappointed in myself. I thought I had all this worked out before I even started school, but I've been struggling every day. So this is just my rants about life. Feel free to comment or offer advice. Thanks Sepphhyy
You are not alone. Others are solo too. maybe the friends dont ask because they get that there is a "dont ask dont tell" wall up wiht you already and they would rather not impose on your privacy. as far as valentines day. it sucks to be alone on it. the best thing you can do is go treat yourself to something but maybe avoid restaurants and stuff where couples are.
I'm sure your friends care but they don't want to bring it up for fear of making you uncomfortable. They can't read your mind, and don't know that you'd like them to bring it up. So why not bring up the subject yourself and come out. Get it over with. With respect to school - I'd be more upset about that. I'm sorry you've had to put it off due to money problems. Have you looked into student loans?
I guess this kind of pertains to both of your issues, but are they close friends or acquaintances? If your friends ARE close to you, then the best thing to do would be to test the waters, find out how they feel about homosexuality, and then work your way from there as is appropriate. Being close friends sometimes it can be hard to bring up a big issue like that, because it may(or may not) change your friendship. The reason I said my question pertains to both of your issues is because if they are more acquantances than close friends, then maybe a change of scenery might do you some good. If your job is that bad then and you can't find any in the area that you'd be happy with, than maybe move? Obviously this can be a life changing decision, but if you have no attachment to the area (and it sounds like you're relatively young) then now is the time to make changes like this, while you still have the chance to recover from them if you make the wrong decision. If you manage to find a job you like (be it for the work or the pay), that could change your whole outlook on a lot of things, especially school (even more so since you'd be able to make better/more money and school would cause you less stress). Speaking from personal experience, stress from being in the closet, from work, and from school all at the same time just help to exacerbate the other issues; personally I managed to solve this by transfering schools to a school and area I actually liked, not one that my family and friends did.
