I cried for hours today. While at work a girl got flowers delivered from someone, and I had to go to the bathroom to cry. I don't even know why I'm so upset, not like my now ex-husband would have done a damn thing for me for Valentine's Day... but not even my family gave me so much as a Hershey's Kiss, a card, or even a f****** hug... I haven't taken my meds in almost a week, my insurance decided they don't want to pay for them.... IDK what to do..... I even feel alone in a room full of people. Today at orientation I sat at a table alone eating my lunch... no one bothered to speak to me.... am I that hideous??? Paid to overnight a gift to a friend, and they rejected it from Fedex..... that REALLY hurt... Seems like my Daughter is the only person who wants to be around me. I just want someone to want to be around me, I'm not even asking for Love right now, just someone to give me a shot.... Resisted cutting again, wrote my daughter's name on my leg with a black sharpie instead..... ((Yes i put this in post secret, get over it))
(*hug*) I know its easier said than done but if you start to love yourself and regain your confidence, people can sense that...its like sixth sense...and confidence, innersecurity, is the sexiest thing there is IMO btw, theres nothing wrong with crying...i wish i could, i didnt cry at my friends funeral..its miserable :tears:
