Okay guys, if you can help please do! I want to beable to sleep peacefully at night. I was raped when I was in the first grade by my older male cousin. Lately I've been having dreams of it, every night for the past week and all but 1 night the week before and randomly on and off for the past 2 years. But now its getting to the point where im afraid to sleep. I just can't stop reliving it. Has anyone else had this problem, or knows what to do? Help me. Please?
I had a friend who was raped several times by his thuggish older brother starting, he claims, when he was three. His father was an abusive alcoholic and encouraged his older brothers to beat and abuse him for "being weak" and not being "masculine" to his expectations, and his mother wasn't very helpful either. That's the most blood-curdling and scary case of child sexual abuse I've ever heard of, and the details only get worse and worse. He grew up to be a good guy and a somewhat happy one, for the most part. However, he is still stricken with severe panic attacks in crowded situations, even now that he's in his 60s. In fact, I find that a lot of victims of child sexual abuse have lingering symptoms of panic disorder, and one guy I knew even had some dissociative symptoms. All I know to do is acknowledge that something very nasty happened to you. You are very lucky if it doesn't completely screw up your mind. If you feel like it is, there are support centers and therapists out there you can talk to. If anyone is entitled to help, you are. You're in a tough situation, and you are within your rights to reach out for support. The abuse victim I knew best ended up being a father to numerous children, even though he turned out to be flaming gay anyway. On top of that, he's a grandfather several times over. He managed, in spite of his challenges, to live a decent, fulfilled life. The challenges are there. The hurts are there. But he's overall done right well for himself. This is because he is a GOOD person. He is a compassionate person. He is a STRONG person. I think that, in the long-run, strength of character can outlast adversity and misfortune. I know that's easy to say.
I wish I could give you this in person (*hug*) I think the best way to get past a trauma like this is to talk about it. So the help centers are probably a good way to go. If I'm asking something I shouldn't be, I apologize. But have you ever told your family or anyone else what happened? Or have you ever confronted your cousin about what he did? (You don't have to answer this if you don't want to)
I've never told anyone in my family, my mom just though he tried to kiss me, I don't want him to get in trouble so I never told, will never tell. The only people that know are you guys and one of my friends and my girlfriend.
Any medical professional has a duty to keep things like this confidential. It is part of the Hippocratic Oath, and doctors of any kind really believe in this. They are people you can count on to keep things in your life that are private absolutely private. Don't kid around about your mental health. A history of child sexual abuse is serious, and I urge you to get treated for it. If I saw you bleeding from an artery, I would tell you to go to a doctor. What you are going through sounds like PTSD, so get something done, NOW. I am not even close to kidding. ---------- Post added 17th Feb 2012 at 07:15 AM ---------- Child Sexual Abuse - NATIONAL CENTER for PTSD ---------- Post added 17th Feb 2012 at 07:16 AM ---------- Adult survivors of sexual abuse, PTSD, sexual assault ---------- Post added 17th Feb 2012 at 07:28 AM ---------- And, speaking to others, one thing I cannot stress enough to people who don't understand child sexual abuse, it is a true form of assault. It is not like a case of a somewhat ignorant adult fondling a child while cuddling on one occasion, regretting it when the kid reacts negatively and then never doing it again. That crap happens all the time, and even very stupid adults realize pretty quickly that kids don't like being touched in that way. Even if you do it with a juvenile or early adolescent animal (I tested this), that animal will bite you; that would not always be the case with an ADULT animal, which might be receptive (I tested this too). Child sexual abuse is something evil and harmful that is done as often as not under the influence of drugs or alcohol, and abusers generally don't have much compassion for their victims.
I honestly dont think i need that kind of help. That really scares me to even think of going to a docter for this.
I understand. I hope you'll do what is good for you, in your own time, in your own way. If the nightmares get to be too much for you, though, just know that the system of psychiatric care today is very flexible. They don't make you tell ANYTHING you don't want to. All you have to say is that you suffer from recurring nightmares that are interfering with your sleep, and they'll just do what they can for you. If you're ever asked for any information you don't volunteer, you don't have to be there.
