Ok, I know what it is and everything, but I have been switching between wanting to come out and wanting to never say anything to anyone. Because most of the time I feel like I have this huge dirty secret that I'm hiding from everyone, and I desperately want to tell them, but sometimes I just give in to my fear of how people will treat me differently or whatever. So that's when I really start wondering why coming out is so important. Right now, I am out to two very close friends, who are not my best friends, but one of them is bi, and is kind of helping me figure out what I am, and the other is pansexual. There are other people I could tell who would not judge me at all, and I am going to tell one of them at least before he graduates this year, but for everyone else, why do they have to know? I have been very discreet with my relationships so far, but all of my friends are used to me being pretty tight-lipped anyway about my relationships with guys, so it hasn't raised their suspicions at all. I just wonder, why should I come out and have to face all of that discrimination and hate when I can just be careful and discreet and not have to do any of that?
If you can manage being discreet and careful about it, then by all means do so. The only reason I came out in the first place was because although I'd much rather be discreet and not tell anyone, my luck I would forget who I told what to and get backed into a corner and outted. But be warned, although hiding can work it takes a lot of energy to maintain the illusion to the public and it can be draining. But like I said, if you can do it then awesome you don't have to come out.
It all depends on if you have to lie about cetain things to your friends. The reason I came out was so that I could stop lying to my friends, because it was too hard to keep track of what I was telling them. If there's no reason to come out to one of your friends, then you have no obligation to do so.
I know that I am able to maintain this whole facade, but I just don't want to feel like I am living a lie. I want to be able to show anyone I am dating to any of my friends and family, and have them know. But I know some people will react very badly, and I am just afraid of that.
