So I'm trying to figure out what this means exactly...basically what spectrum of the Kinsey Scale I fall under. Physically (so sexually) I am attracted to 'female' more, but mentally (as in the idea of being with[for long term]) I am attracted to 'male' more. with 'male':'female' scale for former and latter being 3:2 and 4:1.
People sometimes differentiate between their sexual and romantic orientations - so you can, for example, find people who are heterosexual homoromantic and the like. Maybe it could help you to think of things this way? As for the Kinsey scale, I've come across this test before for the Klein grid (which is a bit of a different take on the scale) that you might find helpful: Klein Sexual Orientation Grid But remember that ultimately numbers are just numbers, and labels are just labels - at the end of the day, you're attracted to whoever you're attracted to, and the statistics shouldn't matter so much.
I personally have been feeling so much better about everything since I got into the mindset that labels don't matter. Labels aren't going to really change who you love. You love who you love and (for me) it is comforting to have accepted that at least.
Could it be (in terms of romantic attraction) that you haven't had any real examples of homosexual couples in your life, whether they be real people or in the media or whatever? I know for me at least when I started questioning, I knew I liked guys sexually, but couldn't picture myself actually dating/living with one. Almost as if you're holding onto the typical white picket fence lifestyle: husband, kids, dog, nice house, etc. etc. This isn't necessarily the case for you, but it might be something worth considering. Let it be known that gay couples can have just as fulfilled lives as everyone else.
Is it possible that part of the reason you see yourself with a man more is that imagining yourself with a man makes it easier to see yourself in a feminine role, and that that's part of the attraction for you? Obviously, that isn't necessarily the case, but I just want to point out that it's possible for gender issues to cloud sexual orientation issues. What if you imagine yourself taking a feminine role in a relationship with a woman--or if you imagine a female partner who is masculine? And is it still just as easy to imagine yourself in a relationship with a man if the man is very feminine? What I want to distinguish is how much of your interest in men as long-term partners is about the men, and how much is about the role you would feel you have in relation to a man.
Thank you all for the advice (and Chandra for the grid). The one things that I've been able to take from all of those bits of advice is that for me to be able to answer any of those honestly, I need to be in a relationship that has lasted longer than 2 weeks...so I guess until that happens I'll still have a bit of uncertainty.
