I guess this is a small issue to some people, so I apologise for infringing upon the time of you lovely people, but I have nowhere else to turn at this moment. :icon_sad: I'd been feeling really good about coming out and telling people my sexuality recently; I'd just previously told one of my friends at my drama group and she was so sweet and supportive. I finally thought I could maybe start telling some friends who aren't anywhere on the LGBTQ spectrum today. However, today at break time with my friends I was getting a good ribbing about all sorts of things... Usually we have a joke around, and that's fine, I don't mind the odd comment my way or whatever, but today it was utterly out of control. They were twisting my words and saying I said things that I never even said. Then in the middle of this, one just asks: 'are you gay?' I just didn't say anything and continued looking at my phone. Had I not been the subject of a thorough ribbing just moments ago, I think I would've taken the shot to say '...actually'. They all made a big thing out of how I didn't say a thing, as they'd been doing with everything this time, having a big laugh about it. I felt like I was going to puke or have a panic attack (I'm generally a ball of anxiety but I had been feeling pretty good earlier that day for once.) I just feel like I've been set back a few years. Mostly, I'm so disappointed in myself for being too weak to be able to do this.
Welcome to EC! If you're not ready to come out, you can do anything you want when asked "are you gay?". You can deny it. You can deflect the answer ("Why? Are you asking me out? I don't think you're my type."). Or you can tell them that you're not sure yet. Lex
Coming out really isn't easy. Even people who have mostly been out of the closet for years and years and years still have anxiety over it when they're thrust into new situations. At least I do. Coming out is a life-long process and you'll do it hundreds if not thousands of times. It's alright to feel anxious and worried about it, but you shouldn't be disappointed in yourself. An opportunity came for you to come out and you didn't feel like that was the appropriate time, and that's totally alright, there will be plenty of others. Coming out is all about you. Don't worry about anyone else. When you're comfortable I have complete faith that you will act and turn your feelings into real action. You already have. So don't sweat it.
