I know, I've been posting a LOT in the help section of EC. Before I had found this site, all the questions were sitting in my mind like acid. So please forgive me for posting a lot for advice and help. This is different from my previous post, I promise. Anyhow, on with my problem! Today my girlfriend and I kissed. 1: It was our first kiss. 2: It was my first kiss with a girl. 3: It was my first kiss with tongue. Afterward I managed to put on a smile, but I didn't feel really any "spark" or anything. Once I got home I grabbed my toothbrush and scrubbed my mouth, lips, and tongue as hard as I could, gagging all the time when I thought about the kiss. Now, this is not a new reaction. I had two boyfriends, one of which got the same reaction without the gagging. Again, this was my first kiss with tongue. Now, like all of my other relationships, the kiss is festering in my mind and corroding the relationship. I wanted to kiss her. I truly did. Now I regret it and feel like I might have lost all my feelings for her? (Like how it was with everyone else I have kissed.) What? Any advice on how to handle such a thing? It's so delicate, this may lead to our breaking up or staying together. I'm starting to freak out and school tomorrow is going to suck, how do I act around her? What's wrong with me? (I was crazy about her before this!) Also this whole thing makes me upset and nervous. She helped me break out of my depression, this whole kiss thing may upset me again. I'm so confused! :tears:
Hey, just calm down Just so you know, my first kiss with tongue was terrible! I hated it! I was proud of the fact that I did it, but I really really did not like it at all. I couldn't understand how people were always so enthusiastic about it, when I just found it weird, not nice at all, and afterwards very awkward. I didn't know what all the drama was about, and I sure as hell didn't feel like kissing someone right away again. Looking back at it, the reason for this was that I just didn't know what the hell to do and how it was supposed to feel like. Your first kiss with tongue is pretty weird, and basically you're just doing something without knowing what exactly that is. That "spark" was probably missing because you were nervous and too occupied with concentrating on the kiss. Trust me, it gets better the more you practice. You'll learn what you like, you'll learn to be more confident and after a while it gets really really good (even though you probably can't imagine that right now -- really, I had the same thing) I have yet to meet the first person who doesn't think kissing is nice... Now if you really have to gag so badly that you feel it's impossible to try and kiss her again, then maybe you weren't ready to begin with. I don't know how old you are? But if you're not really ready to kiss someone and you're just (unconciously) doing it because you feel it should be time or she wants to, then you'll probably not like it, and it will even be gross. And remember, your relationship is not just based on this kiss. There's a lot more to a relationship than that, so I doubt this will lead to a breakup. Talk to her about it; ask her how she felt about the kiss. Does she know it was your first kiss, with tongue, with a girl? I think talking about it might really help in your case. Don't worry about it too much! It was just a kiss -- your first, which means you have lots and lots of experiences ahead of you that will help you figure out what you like and without a doubt will be much better! I'm sure.
When I first started kissing I thought it was nast, I hated it to, I thought it was so weird but it's because it is new to you. Just take it slow start off with tap kisses only and ease your way into other types of kisses.
I agree with the posters above, there is certainly no reason you need to rush into kissing with your tongues, you can still have passionate kissing without tongues.
Thank you all for responding. I really appreciate it. I will try not to kiss with tongue next time, but she initiated it so... -Gulp.- But thank you very very much, you all made me calm down and think through it rationally.
