I have a couple of gay and bi friends but none of them know I'm gay. I've been considering coming out to one bi friend who I use to be good friends with at school the reason being that I'd like to come out to someone who will understand what I'm going through and with whom I'll be able to actually discuss things. My main concern is that I don't really hang out with this one bi friend (a girl) anymore and don't feel very close to her. It's not that we don't like each other, we have lots in common, but we've lost contact since the end of school. We've only seen each other a couple of times throughout the years. Our last contact was at the beginning of this year, a couple of messages on Facebook. But out of all my gay and bi friends, she'd be my first choice. Would it be okay to get in touch with her out of the blue, say that I've got something I'd like to talk to her about and eventually come out to her? It seems like that would be random and not appropriate... but at the same time, I'd have a reason to come out to her since she's bi and I'd be seeking her advice/support. What do you guys think? Is it worth telling her or should I forget it? :dry:
Definitely. It's always great to hear from old friends! You can catch up with a lot of other stuff too, and I'm sure she will value the fact that you chose her as a person you would like to come out to and believe that she would understand you. So go for it. Good luck!
This really does sound like a good idea. Even if the two of you aren't that close anymore, she should still at the very least be able to advise you on what to do next- I was in quite a similar situation when an old friend came out to me- even though we hadn't talked in a couple of years I gave her advice and helped her the best I could. There's no way she won't be helpful, presumably having gone through a similar process herself. Also-the fact that she sounds a little detached from your day to day life may be a good thing- it can be really hard to come out to people close to you, so this is a good way to start out on a safe bet. Good luck!
I understand the situation that you're not close with someone (at least not as much anymore) but they're LGBT and that feels comfortable. I did this and it felt good for me.
I totally think you should go for it I'm only really starting to come out of the closet again, but I've just discovered... there's nothing like being honest with yourself and with old friends. And if she's able to guide you through this, I have a feeling she'll be happy to help guide you, and you'll be much better off to just have someone there who understands. Good luck whatever you decide
Thanks guys She was friends with me on Facebook so I thought I'd have a look at her page but she's gone! She vanished from Facebook! I can't find her on our mutual friends' list of friends either... Hopefully nothing bad happened. Might try contacting her through another friend. I'll keep you guys updated!
