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What Do I Say?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by secretguyX, Mar 13, 2012.

  1. secretguyX

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    So my friend who I told I was bisexual 3 months ago and I was gay yesterday was asking me some questions at lunch and after school, after kind of ignoring the topic since I said it. Her main question was, "If you had a wish, would you wish to not be like this?" I didn't really know how to answer that. I said probably, then said I don't know. I've finally accepted myself and know I'm never going to be straight, so I don't really know how to answer it. Yes, I'd prefer being straight if I had a choice, but this is who I am now. Plus if I had a wish, I'd use it on something selfless, such as bringing back my dad (it'd benefit me, but many others as well), helping someone in my family or a friend, or helping someone in need (homeless, poor, etc..). And if I say yes, it may seem as if I'm not okay with who I am. But if I say no, then she may think it was a choice and I want to be gay. She also asked if this is who I want to be for the rest of my life. I'm not sure if she thinks it's a choice or something, even though I've specified it's not.
     
  2. silverhalo

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    Hey I dont think it necessarily matters how you answer it, I think you should just be honest. Perhaps she was just trying to talk about something LGBT to make sure you felt comfortable talking about it since you only just came out to her as gay.
     
  3. TruffleDude

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    She definitely gave you some things to think about. That is part of the process of self-awareness. Question, question, question...without questioning yourself you would never grow.
     
  4. Carpe Diem

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    I don't like the fact that her MAIN question was that. She probably didn't have any ill intention but it just didn't sit well with me. It kinda suggests that she's not comfortable with the idea but maybe I'm reading too much into it.

    Choosing to be straight if you were given a choice is nothing to be ashamed of. No one wants to be part of the minority. However, accepting yourself is more important and dwelling on impossible situations isn't productive at all. You were honest when you answered and that's all that matters.

    Having said that, my answer to that question is: "If I had a wish, I wouldn't waste it on something as trivial as that!" (and it wouldn't be some selfless wish like yours):icon_wink
     
  5. greeneyes

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    Agreed. Also, she's thirteen. Thirteen-year-olds don't know what to say about anything, let alone a mature topic. It's hard to be precocious haha.
     
  6. secretguyX

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    Thanks everyone! I guess you're right, she just wanted to talk about it. The question just caught me off guard. She seems awkward about it in general, so I guess it's nice she even brought it up. I'll actually give her an answer then, cause I didn't say much of anything then.