so i have been on a bit of a rejection streak. noone wants me. well no guys that is. lol. girls can't get enough. anyway, it hurts sometimes becuase it's so hard coming out and trying to put yourself out there to date (i'm not really 100 percent out and live a double life), so when you finally do and u get rejected it kinda hurts. but here's what i am realizing, the people that are rejecting me aren't all that great theirselves. also, you have to put yourself out there to date and even if you are straight, you go through tons of girls (if you're a guy) in order to meet someont that really "cliques) with you. i guess because when you're not out and you have limited options to meet guys (online or at clubs), then it just seems like more of a blow when someone blows you off. but the people that reject you are also bringing you closer to knowing what you really want, what you will not tolerate, and so when you finally meet the person you are supposed to be with, it will be great. well, this is my hope.
I like the sound of that hope and think you may well be right Everyone goes through rejection whether straight, gay, bi or whatever. I've never been much of one for laying down and taking rejection, I had a just brush it off and try again/someone else sort of attitude, though I'm not sure that I would have that anymore, my relationship has softened me over the last two years haha but yeah I think you should listen to what you've said there cause you definately had some good points
I think i am going through what your going but instead of the rejection, i am not taken seriously by anyone which really puts me down and lowers my value. At least you have hope, my hope is dieing the more i meet guys and have dead/empty sex that's it.
I admire you for at least getting out there and trying! You will find someone eventually, don't worry. It's interesting that you say the people who reject you aren't that great of people themselves, but you ask them anyways. This reminds me of that quote "Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing them game" or something along those lines. I have this idea in life, that sometimes in order to find out what you want, you have to define everything you DON'T want first. Kind of like definition through negation.
I admire you for going out there too. You know how many times I've been rejected? Zero. You know why? I've never tried. -_- So you are better than me! Haha. Thanks for sounding so hopeful and making it seem a little more okay for me to try. You'll find the person that is right for you.
thanks all. i mean, there is somethign to gaydar so i have actually been pretty accurate on how i think is gay or not. but i have only tried for those that also take it a step further and let me know they are interested through the non verbal cues. anyways, i guess something that has been bothering me a lot lately is finding the kinda guy that i would like and have compatibility with. i can meet guys that are attractive and can offer sex but i do not want that. even today i was at a meeting and passed by a hall and saw this great looking professional guy that i would have loved to talk to. he was with a young lady so i couldn't say anything and i was visting that office so i will never see him again. but my point is, i have NEVER met those kinda guys thru the gay online website or clubs. also, im black so the black guys that are masculine and professional and not "out" do not go to gay events or gay clubs because they fear they have too much to lose. the ones that do go rarely have "much to lose" but also aren't ones that I am attracted to as many are just out for sex, etc. if i were more attracted to white guys, things would be a bit easier because there so many white guys that go to gay events and lbgt stuff and you have a better variety of types to select from. however, with the black guys a lot of them are closeted (not all of course) but many are so everyone's walking around in a closet and can't really ever meet anyone. i just do not know how to meet the kinda guys i like. i have joined professional organizations and stuff and they are there, but they are "straight" and even if they are not "straight" they are far too afraid of someone blowing their cover to risk being too flirty. i'm racially open but honestly you just kinda feel like an outsider when you're the only black guy in a room of all white gay guys. it would be the same if everytime you went to a gay function, everybody was black and you were one or two whites there. you would still have fun but if you felt more attracted to white guys, you wouldn't have a great chance of meeting any there. well it just makes things frustrating because its like i either just take the casual sex route which is empty and wont get me anywhere or i can continue to crush on straight guys that aren't going to want me anyway. i'm open to dating out of my race but just am not trying to force it because its not my prefernnce.
