This guy is driving me crazy

This post is going to make me sound downright creepy, but I don't care. This situation really makes me feel like crap.

(I'm gay/bi, still deep in the closet)

So there's this kid where I work. He's the cutest/hottest guy I've ever seen in my life. He's perfect. Perfect face, amazing body.. anyway. He works in a different department but we both used to be in the same one. Ever since he moved were are actually able to talk even more, but I almost always feel like crap after talking to him. I can't really explain why and it's frustrating. I over think everything I say, which sometimes comes back to screw me in that I'll want to say something but it'll come out completely wrong. Any slight bad reaction from him gets me like.. upset. And I hate it.

The other day he said to me "You're really popular". To be honest it's true, I'm friends with a ton of people both at school and work (we go to different schools though). He doesn't have a lot of friends at work. It wouldn't be a longshot for me to say I'm his best work friend. But he seems to really like me. Every single week he asks me my work schedule, and he reacts accordingly if I am or if I'm not scheduled on the same days. He is almost always the one to walk up and start a conversation. It also seems like he's not sure if I like him. Like, when we're in the break room, he'll literally stand there and talk to me, making it obvious he's not sure if he should sit down. But I just don't get how a kid that good looking could have confidence issues with someone like me.....

When it comes to Facebook and twitter, all I do is try to impress now. It's ridiculous and pathetic. I want more likes just so that he knows I have friends. I'm not sure why its so important to prove that to him, but it is.

This post is kind of all over the place, but you get the point. I really want to ask for his phone number, or even hang out with him outside work, but I don't know how to do it in a way that's not creepy. Then again, maybe getting his number is a bad idea. If he's a bad texter (doesn't text back) that will drive me crazy.

The point: I love talking to this kid but he makes me feel like shit. I find myself wishing he was working every time I am. I've even gone to the extent of switching shifts so that I'm scheduled at the same time, lying about why I wanted to switch! Anyone have any suggestions for how to deal with this? I find myself wanting to prove that he really does like me, like ignore him for a day and see how he reacts. (I feel really weird saying that). Have any of you had a situation like this? I need help or I'm going to drive myself crazy over him.

Thanks for reading.

 

Yeah I guess that's part of it

 

That's probably what a normal person would do, but I feel weird asking some guy from work if he wants to hangout or go to the movies (although the movies is possible, we're always talking about new movies). I don't want it to seem like a date.

 

Maybe I will ask him to come. He asked who I went with when I went the other night, which I thought was kind of weird. Problem is he's not friends with the people from work I go with. It could just be awkward.

To answer different questions, we're both 17. Different grades though. We happen to be looking at the same college, one two and a half hours away. He said he really liked it, butt then again he's only a junior so that could easily change. It would be interesting if we both go there. I'm leaning towards it for reasons actually outside of him. Problem is if I dont stop myself from feeling this way about him, it will only be worse when we're in college and I can't have that.

Also, he seems to have a lot of friends outside of school. He's always talking about what a crazy night he had. He tweets about stuff like that. I don't think his social life is lacking at all, unfortunately for me. With how he looks I can't imagine it would be.

And on a side note, he told me to follow him on Twitter the other night (which came from an attempt I made of asking someone else if I follow them when he was standing right there.. It worked). He said he would follow me if I don't. That didn't happen. Last night I did it with him sitting down right there, and he was on twitter late last night. Didn't follow me back. I feel like he's playing the mind games that I consider lol

As for him having a crush on me, I don't think I'm very good looking so I doubt it. He does seem a little gay sometimes actually, so......

 

Things have been going well. We've had several long conversations lately about random shit, and of course along the way I have made a few stupid/awkward comments that have made me feel dumb. He tweeted something the other day (something that he did that he told me he was going to do) and I sent him a fb message asking him how it went. He answered. I answered with a question. No reply. Now ignoring messages is really a pet peeve of mine, so I was and still am annoyed. It was a very simple question and I can't imagine why he ignored it, but of course it makes me feel like he doesn't want to talk to me. Even though he'll walk up to me at work just to say hey and I guess expect me to bring something up because he usually doesn't. But that he doesn't want to talk to me outside work.

I want to make it clear, though subtlety, that I'm annoyed with him over the next few days, by like not really talking to him much or something. Bad idea?

I hate when people don't reply to me, as most of you do I'm sure, but the fact that HE did it makes it worse.

 

I wouldn't consider him to be gay, and because I'm so far in the closet asking him about his sexuality is completely out of the question. No offense to anyone, but he would probably take that as an insult. I feel like I live in a different culture maybe.. Around here at least being gay is absolutely a bad and weird thing. So that's why I can't ask.

Also, he knows the people at work, but it's one of those things where he's been around them for so long but hasn't talked to them at all so it'd just be awkward. He's extremely shy too. Whenever I go up to him with one of my friends he'll be very hesitant and say almost nothing. Go up alone and he's fine. This is a very weird situation. I'm starting to think that maybe he is just playing mind games with me...

To Doctor: I doubt he'll reply after two days. He's a nice kid, but he seems like one of those people who will just randomly ignore someone. I've seem him do it on twitter.

Then again, he does throw me off sometimes. Like an hour ago, instead of asking if I'm working tomorrow he said "I'll see you tomorrow then?". And he asked me twice within a minute what time I'll be in....

 

You're right, but even if he was I doubt he'd tell me

 

Ok, another bump.

So things have been going well. I turned 18 the other day, and he wanted me to buy him something. So he asked if he could have my number (said "I don't know how I don't have it yet", later "you better answer when I text you".. but not rudely like that sounds) and we met on my birthday. We sat in his car and talked for like 20 minutes. He was very giggly and talkative. He thanked me a ton via text afterwards.

Oh, and after I got his number I asked if he's the type of person who just ignored texts. He said no and that's when I brought up the unanswered fb message. He said he doesn't even use fb (even though I know he checks it) and just said sorry.

Yesterday I texted him and asked what he was doing after work. He said he's going to his friend's he thinks, and asked what I was doing. I said some of us were going to the movies and even though he doesn't know them I figured I might as well ask. He said "next time! Thanks for the invite". As far as I can tell, he seems to be with the cool kids at his school but he also seems to really like me. He acts like no other guy I've met. Like today I was talking to someone at work, he walked my and must've done a three take trying to get me to look at him. I'm actually starting to think he could be into me, although that's like a wild idea for me. But like I said I've never had anyone act like this with me.

So I'm thinking soon I want to invite him over to sleepover. He does that stuff that teenagers do, only on the weekends with his friends, and I would love to do it with him. Should I ask? How?


(why am I so paranoid that he's on here reading this.......)