I dont know what to do.. So.. that friend I posted about before I wasnt 100% honest.. I think Im started to like him. For those who dont know, its a boy who Ive become really close too and I know he likes me but he knows Im a lesbian well thats what I "laebel" myself. Idont know why anyone has to have a label, I dont think its anyones buisness unless you are trying to support someone or you are interested in the person. Thats a whole different thread line lol but anyways Ive gotten close to him and he is ALWAYS here for me. So maybe I like him.. Or is it just because I really need someone to talk to and be here for me and my girlfriend isnt, or hasnt been recently?! I Havent slept because I cant stop thinking about it. My girlfriend and I havent been getting along either. Shes really deppressed and Ive been sorta letting her take it out on me.. Well the other day she pushed it and I just shut down. She told me I make everything worse and pretty much implied everything is my fault. She dont me to "leave her the h*ll alone" and to "give her some F*cking space" shes never ever talked to me like that. The only reason I kept calling her was because she told me she was going to kill herself. So I simplily replied "be careful what you wish for, you just might get it" and havent really replied to her or answered her phone calls since. That was a few days ago. Oh but I told her I was done, we needed a break. The night before last me and this boy kissed. I know what youre thinking, Im scum. I know I feel horriable because I really do love my girlfriend and I know I dont have that kind of love for this boy. SO, in the end Ill prolly end up hurting them both. I talked to the boy and told him I shouldnt have done that because Im not sure of my feelings for men, or him, and I do love my girlfriend but I just dont know if its going to work out. He respected that but we havent hung out since. My girlfriend still has been being rude to me because of whats going on in her life. Shes like a whole different person than when we started dating. Part of me wants to stand by her and wait, another part says Ive put up with so much already and its only getting worse..... What do i do!!!?? :bang:
Man, I wouldn't stick with the label just yet. If you really like this guy and you are having serious thoughts about him then you can't just turn your back. Perhaps you are right and your girlfriend has driven you towards him but we don't know that for sure. I think first you have to define what it is you want from your relationship with her but it sounds as though she is really having issues that you can't deal with right now. If you are going to be with her then that is where you should concentrate because if you don't there will always be other temptations. If you are on a break then it is time to test the waters on your feelings about this guy or guys in general. Perhaps you may like both given the right set of circumstances. I hope this doesn't confuse you more than you already are.
