How do you know when the right time to come out is? In 2 years I'll be going on a trip to South America, a trip that I've been planning for as long as I can remember. Unfortunately my friend invited some kid who I'm pretty sure is homophobic. I was thinking about coming out before that, but at the same time I don't want my trip to be ruined by this kid. Any thoughts?
for me coming out just sort of happened...the was no right time i guess. I had plenty of opportunities beforehand and it almost seemed surreal when i finally uttered the words to someone other than myself. I guess this isn't really much help but what i read before that was that you should come out when it is more uncomfortable being in the closet than being out would be.
Don't postpone coming out for 2 YEARS to satisfy a homophobic person who might be going on a trip that is planned for 2 years from now. Life is too short! Who knows whether that person will go on the trip? Who knows if you'll go on the trip? And even if you both do - wouldn't you rather be open and honest about who you are on this 'trip of a lifetime'? Come out based on what makes sense today.
AGREED!! Also you don't want to make your trip miserable either by being in the closet or by feeling uncomfortable with this person (or both).
personally i would not want the kid to go. if you organized the trip who gave teh other guy the right to ask someone else. personally if you are paying money for a trip of a lifetime, i wouldn't want some jerk to go and ruin it or make me feel bad about myself the whole time im there. i would uninvite him or just go with a youth tour group.
If you've never met the kid and are "pretty sure he's homophobic" then...meet him. I'd like to know who I'm going to South Africa with. In regards to coming out, it'll just happen when it happens. Don't run and force it, that will backfire. Coming out when you're not ready is the worst possible thing you could do in the situation. One day you'll wake up and just...know the time's right.
