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how do i defend him?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MrHojalata98, Mar 29, 2012.

  1. MrHojalata98

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    So there is this guy in my school, who in simple words is VERY ANNOYING. you know the kind of guy who thinks everyone is their friends but in reality no one likes him. Well something really weird happened today in lunch. I went to the table where my friends were eating a little late because i was talking to some other friends and when i got there i heard them talking about the guy i mentioned at the beggining. Turns out he told one of my friends a few weeks back that he is bisexual, so there alone i was shocked. i mean what are the odds that the one guy that is like me, is one of the few people i dont like, it seemed like a cruel joke. But back to the story, Him and my friend got in a fight and they both started talking trash about each other, until my friend pulled the final blow by outing him to all of our friends. But wait it gets worse, they want to out him to the entire school! i tried to tell them that they were taking it a little too far but all i got was shocked looks because i never really cared about the guy. So yes i dont like the guy but that doesnt mean i want him to be outed to the whole school, especially because i know i would die inside f that happened to me im simply not ready for everyone to know that about me and i doubt he is either. So please someone tell me how to defend him without well sounding suspicious
     
  2. Revan

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Tell them exactly this: "We may not really like him, but that doesn't make it right for us to out him to the school. It's his own life, and do you really want to cause that damage for him? What if he did something because he becomes ostracized (potentially even more than he is now) and goes and kills himself? Do we really want to be the cause of that?" I know it's harsh and maybe he wouldn't kill himself, but sometimes to deal with idiots (no offence to you cause you're at least concerned for him, and I know they're your friends but they're still being idiots) you have to put the shock value into them. Because it honestly sounds like just telling them "oh don't do it. It would hurt him." or "Don't do it because it's bullying or mean" honestly I can tell would do nothing, they'd still do it.

    Trust me...being outed to your entire school is not fun. I told a friend on MSN I was bi (before figuring out I was gay) and the next day an email had gone not only out to everyone in my high school, but it even went to people at three other high schools in my city. It's enough that people who know me wound up knowing, but that HS students in my entire city knew? Yeah, not fun.
     
  3. Caoimhe Fayre

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    what about just asking them what his sexuality has to do with his horrible personality, and asking them if they really want to look like a bunch of homophobes when it sounds like there are actual legit reasons for disliking this guy that are not his sexuality...