Sorry for the ranting title. DX It's just... This past month I've gained a LOT of confidence. I'm not sure if it was the fact that I had support from this site, or I was just starting to accept myself. Anyway, my chick friend at school, Izzy, said I should "marry" her on facebook. Meh. I hate facebook, still do, and I never go on it. But whatever floats her boat... So for the first time in months, I logged on and sent her the request. Boom. We were "married." At school, she's in my 6th hour. So she always calls me "wifey." I'm coo' with it, I call her wifey back, you know. Trying to be a nice person. She's highly attractive, even if she's on the erm... "heavier" side. Gorgeous hair & eyes, funny and sweet. Lately she's been saying "were gonna have a kid ohmygosh" and stuff, and a friend of ours in the same class (Grace) asked if she could be wives with us too. So now were three wives, I guess. x'D I don't like either of them more than friends, though. Honestly. Their not my type. Izzy and Grace often put their hand gently on my stomach and "ask how the babies doing." Lmao. I love them, their so hysterical. But... I dunno. I guess my gay-dar is just going buh-ZERK when I'm around them. Don't get me wrong, it would be SO cool to have gay friends like myself, but sometimes I feel like their flirting heavily and openly with me. Grace is drop-dead beautiful, too. It makes me feel wonderful, even if they aren't bi/gay, that their playfully flirting with me. Even if it's just joking. It's nice for a change from pervy guys at my school. Definitely not saying every guy is pervy, but a lot of them I know really are. ONTO THE POINT. Grace, Izzy, lots of my chick friends and tons of boys have been asking me lately things like, "Are you les?" or "Are you bi?" some even ask if I'm bi-curious. I find it uncomfortable and frankly, blunt and even slightly rude. I 'unno, maybe it's just me. But I'm deep in the closet and I don't want ANYONE to know right now. So I've had to LIE to them about it. Usually I laugh a little and say, "Why do you ask that?" a lot of them say things like "Because you act like it." so in self-defense, I say, "Well I'm not.." I'm lesbian. Truly. But I don't want anyone to know. How can I not straight out tell someone I'm gay, if they ask me? I hate lying like this. I'm not a liar. My mom raised me to tell the truth. If I lie, it takes a very long time to earn back her trust so I do my best not too as I think Whats the point if I'll just keep losing her trust? I guess I can see why so many people ask me. I look like a stereotypical lesbian. Well... sort of. I'm not butch-looking or whatever. (No offense to anyone♥) I have long blonde hair, big blue eyes and above-average size lips. But I wear a lot of plaid, have a slightly deeper than most girls voice, and talk with a gay lisp most of the time. Not because I have to, but because I want to. To me it's fun, and it's my way of constantly reminding myself to never stop being who I really am. <3 Sorry, this post was kinda all over the place. So if you got confused, (I know I did while writing it XD), my question I'm asking is how can I stop lying to people about who I really am without straight up telling them OMFG I'M A LESBIAN. :eek:
Well....hmmm.....best way to do it might just be to be totally honest with them and tell them outright! Is there a specific reason that you don't want to do that? Like is it that you don't want to be out, or is it that you just want to stop lying because you think that it's morally wrong?
Okay.. first of all: thank you sincerely because as I read your info I had an lol moment. I got to your "location" line thinger mijiger and giggled to myself. And i myslef have been having problems with this.. I'm a freshman in highschool and it seems that there's pressure to start dating. The first time it happened to me was when I was in biology class.. the two girls that sit next to me said: "Hey.. so.. somebody told me--" The other girl cuts her off and says: "you can't ask him that!" And i was like.. "just tell me." AND........ They never told me. I was super suspicious. What made it worse was that later that day somebody i hardly knew actually asked me: "hey bro, what's your deal? Dicks or Chicks?" I was like, really? You stupid?" and had to act cool. So i guess this is a long way of saying i have know idea of how you can not lie to people but not tell them. My advice would be to say.. "Really? You're so arrogant that you think you can ask me things like that? That's personal but to tickle your fancy darling, I'm not into dating right now. So if that's all.. you can leave me alone now Bye!" It's dramatic yes.. but yeah it's all i gotz. GOOD LUCK I hope any of this rambling helped
