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Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Pain, Apr 14, 2012.

  1. Pain

    Pain Guest

    Now, when I talked to my sister, she wondered if I had also told my brother. DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUNN!
    Of course, no, I haven't.... This could prove interesting-- he can be the biggest asshole and the biggest lug in the same day. Sometimes I love him as my brother, and other times I could kill him (which is normal, I guess; he IS my brother)!!! Sis says that he might take it worse if he finds out and knows I didn't trust him with it, than me telling him in the first place. It feels like a more volatile situation than with my sister though, and I'm not sure how things should go... He is ok with gay people, but I guess it's the same issue as with my sister: How will he react to his brother being gay? I'm sure I could tell him with ease, but I'm just not sure.... I don't even know what I'm asking here:icon_redf
     
  2. aLANAN

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    You should definitely tell him soon. He's bound to find out anyways; hopefully, it won't be from other people/sources, but from you. If he accepts gay people in general, he should be able to or learn to accept his own brother. If he cares for and loves you, he will accept you.
    I hope everything turns out well and good luck!
     
  3. fragomatrick

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    I like you. You have no idea what you are talking about. I like that in people!
    I also like the fact that you think way too much and that too needlessly. I do that as well. I am crazy, what's your excuse?!

    I think you should come out to your brother if you think he is cool around gay people.
     
  4. KaotikPrincess

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    Life is a lot easier if you don't keep anything from anybody, no matter how good/bad/complicated it may be or what drama it may cause... Getting it off your chest is the best feeling in the world. If your brother creates drama it's better now than later I think. Try not to over think things, it tends to create anxiety, just try and remain calm and tell him as soon as possible so that you can live your life out in the open, so that you don't have to hide anything, those who accept you love you and really care about you, those who don't accept you well, you don't have to accept them either.

    Just tell him when you are ready, and tell your parents too if you haven't already but tell them soon so you can go about living your life the way you want to and not the way others want you to :grin:
     
  5. Pain

    Pain Guest

    My excuse? :grin: I'm a loud thinker with lots of thoughts :slight_smile:

    Any idea how I should come out to my dear brother? It was nerve-racking telling my sister in person, but I was thinking a message-- a handwritten letter. He likes that kinda stuff, haha. See, like that, he tends to be old-fashioned even though he is not yet even 20! It's silly, but I think it ought to do :lol:

    I like the way you think, Blakqsh33p :slight_smile:
     
    #5 Pain, Apr 14, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 14, 2012
  6. Dalmatian

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    You do intend to tell him once anyway, it doesn't change anything if you do it sooner (other than your peace of mind) and now that your sister knows it just creates a possible problem with "why did you tell her and not me" for later on. The longer you wait, the worse it might be.

    As for how to tell him, well, now you are not alone, you can do it with the sister. Depends on how you feel about it. For me it seems to be much easier to come out to a new person without witnesses :slight_smile: And I don't like the idea of letters because that leaves me out of control.
     
  7. Bree

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    A public location might be better too, if you're not sure how he'll react. Chances are, he won't get too visibly upset around strangers, which gives him time to think before he talks with you again. Also, it gives him the option of bolting if he needs to (lots of people need space after you shock them) and at home, he can't leave as easily.
     
  8. fragomatrick

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