This topic has been covered several times in other threads. And even as I write it, I think I have my answer, but I'm going to vent anyway. So over the years I've deleted and reactivated my Facebook account several times. Each time my list of 'friends' has dwindled, as I just got fed up with the people on there. While I refuse to be one of those people to add everyone from my highschool (including the people that hated me) as some people often do to bolster their friends list, I find it hard to keep people period. They add you, they send you a random message wishing you well, and then they never talk to you again. Or you invite them out to events, parties and they never show, only to find they did something else that night. I think its funny when someone says to me "Oh ____ wants to add me on Facebook, should I?" my answer is simpley, if you have to ask me, you should know the answer. I don't care to have 500 friends on my Facebook, as some people do. I don't even care to have 200, as when it got that high, the list started consisting of old coworkers that I will probably never see again. Old contacts who have just moved on, and well, I'll probably never see again, and in some cases, old friends with sordid and painful history. Just last year I sought out a friend from highschool to see how she was. She completely shut me down, then 3 months later she messages me on Facebook as if to say, "Oh hey! Its fine now! Let's talk" My response was less than welcoming and we remain unfriended. Then you have your close friends, the people you actually see fairly often. But I've noticed a trend that while some of them happily update their status every few hours, and post ongoing comments, its these same people that seem to completely ignore my posts. Be it a joke, or a message, or a funny link (no different than what they share), my posts seem to go ignored. So what does this indicate? Is it the same as tossing a birthday card in the trash without reading it? Ignoring a text message? Phone call? Or are the silly little digital life tidbits, pokes, tweets, and snippets of us that exchange on Facebook of any tangible value? Is the friend that sees me on the weekend and makes my night, less of a friend for ignoring my Facebook link/funny comment or message to them on Wednesday, after updating his/her status five times? I know that if I delete my Facebook, some people will ask why I did it, and if I was angry, and if I will return. But whats the point if after a few months I look back, see a bunch of unanswered messages, unvisited links, and in the end, it just makes me want to unfriend everyone and say screw off. You didn't care enough when I was making an effort, don't pretend to care now. I have high expectations of the people I let get close to me, and I'm still working out the frustrations of those who have hurt me. Its a long drawn out process. Often when I dole out advice on here, I remind people to protect their hearts, and not paint good friends with the same brush as the lousy ones that need to be cut loose, but at the same time, I find it hard to differentiate between the two sometimes.
Yeah... I don't like to have those high numbers of friends too. And maybe that's just why people don't like a status, check out a funny link. I kinda feel the same way when I get no response. But lately, I've cared even less and haven't updated my own status in a long time, but just followed the paltry goings-on in the news feed, and I'm satisfied with that. It is rather silly when you think about it... "keeping in touch" isn't nearly as enthralling as it sounds when it's used to advertise. But don't think you're alone with feeling like that. It really does get under my skin sometimes too.
This is pretty much precisely why I have never created a Facebook account. It sounds like it would just be too much hassle trying to have amicable interactions with people that I really don't want to bother with. The whole thing seems vapid and annoying (and I type this as I scroll through my Twitter feed :lol: - although I don't have anyone I know in person on there for the same reason).
I think maybe you misunderstand the way that most people use Facebook. You only comment on things if you have something to say. Otherwise, it's just a nice update on what's going on in people's lives. The whole idea is that you can loosely keep up with what's going on with a lot of people without having to interact with each of them individually and separately. Stuff comes in your newsfeed and you read it. You post what you want other people to know about you. You can interact on a more personal level if you want--but for the most part, most people don't. I guarantee you, those people who post status updates six or seven times a day do not, by any stretch of the imagination, expect you to respond to each one of those posts. Or ANY of them. That's why they don't respond to yours. They don't think there is any expectation to respond to every post. Private messages and posts to other people's walls are a little different, but you shouldn't expect that just because someone is posting status updates that they really have access to the rest of Facebook. Many people post status updates from their mobile phones, without really logging on Facebook so that they would even see your posts or your message, so they have no idea that you sent them anything. I think maybe the problem is that you keep expecting Facebook to be something different than it is.
I don't really get the idea of posting status updates every day. Just seems weird to constantly tell 100s of people what you are doing everyday. I only use facebook every once in a while to send things to people and chat occasionally. I don't bother updating my profile or anything.
I have a Facebook account, but I never really use it. It's there in case I need to FB stalk someone, but at the same time I never use it and I ignore the countless emails I get from it. I personally think that if you dwell too much into the meaning of being ignored on a meaningless site, then you'll probably just end up collapsing into a just a meaningless depression. Don't over think it– sometime people are just bitches.
I'm one of those people who posts status updates every day, for the most part, but I do it because I'm usually sharing links, observations, or ideas with my friendslist at large. It's basically my way of saying, "Here's something that's on my mind. Anyone want to pipe in on it?" or "Hey everyone, here's something I found amusing/insightful that you might like too! Now I don't have to individually share this joke/idea with all 160 of you one at a time!" That summed it up better than I could.
You might be correct, but I still see conversations being built on superficial comedic links, and when I share them, they go ignored. I dunno, maybe I'm over analyzing.
Sometimes when I'm bored with everyones updates, I just start posting random stuff, mostly stuff that ticks some off. It's not very mature but I laugh so hey. I have a friend that just checks in constantly in random places she's never been for no reason. I think everyone takes facebook way too serious. Post something completly random and I bet someone will notice then. lol
A study was done that found when you have something like 300 FB friends or more you end up becoming depressed whenever you use FB and can cause depression in girls. When I've been down and reached out for someone on FB, those posts are completely ignored. However, when one of my less than 30 FB friends (I know, right?) posts something reaching out for emotional support, everyone else jumps on and offers advice and support. I always hated FB but I really see no use for it now. I keep it mainly as a way to showcase my current photography in the hope that networking might pay off with a job or at least some work, and to keep in touch with distant relatives. Facebook is really screwed, and most of us can see that. A bus driver in New Zealand last year told me he and his buddies call it Facemask because you can make the world see you as you want, not as you are. Like wearing a mask...
I get on facebook maybe once a month. So, I'm definitely one of those people who never responds or comments on anything in general. Could be a similar situation with people on your list?
