So I'm in a rut people. I lke two different people...of two different genders. And well things are geting all confusing for me. The guy: I'll call him D. Now I had no clue who D was until well almost exactly a year ago. When I first saw D, we were both having Hire Meetings on the same day for a job. Btw D is my age, 15. So when I first saw him, I honestly had to force myself from my jaw dropping. He's sexy and cute and endearing. We didn't talk that night, even though I sat right next to him to fill out some paperwork. My Gaydar was going off like crazy. His mom and my dad were talking but that was it. I made it my oal for the rest of the summer to meet him. Btw, our jobs are at an amusement park in the games department. I saw him once more before meeting him, when changing shifts, he was taking my place. We didn't talk though. We did end up meeing though from Friday-Saturday one week we worked together, rare occurence. We made quick friends and my God, I still swear I'm falling in love with him. Any other day I knew he was working, I made it a point to visit him on my breaks. Whenever I'd get close to his game, he'd smile when he saw me. I'd spend my whole break talking to him.i ended up coming out to him. He's fine with it. Ever since the end of summer we've hardly talked, he hates to text, or saw each other. I really want him to be gay or bi and like me but on Facebook a couple months ago I saw a conversation between him and some of his friends, apparently since he hasn't had any girlfriends his mom thinks hes gay. He made a point to say 'he likes boobies.' The girl: I'm going to call her A. She's gorgeous. I've known her since 7th grade and had even asked her out before. She sadly turned me down. So last year I ate lunch with her every day, definetely a lot of fun, we got closer. This year we have Science together. Whenever we have projects, she wants to work with me, whether it's attraction or the fact that I'm smart, idk. But whenever she sees me she smiles. I wait for her after class. I really want her to like me back but I don't know yet. Ok guys...and gals...and those somewhere in the middle...what advice to all of you have on handling these crushes? I really need it. :/
Your crush for the guy is similar to my experience with my crush. I had a recent thread about him. Long story short, I had come out to my crush too, but he was "battling for the other team." This may hurt, but if you came out to him, he probably would have come out to you too if he were gay as well. So I'm assuming he's either straight or too afraid to come out. Hang in there though! Your relationship may continue to develop and he might come out to you. Or if you really want to know now, you should just confess to him about your crush..I did for mines and he let me down nicely. I think it would solve a lot of questions and confusion if you just let him know, but it's your choice. As for the girl, I think it may be too early to know? Are there any other signs that might point to her possible attraction towards you?
If I tell D, who knows what'll happen in two weeks, that's when our work starts again. I want to work with him and just make sure things aren't weird between us, but I don't want to work with him if things are awkward between us.
Things will only be awkward between you and D if you make it awkward. He says he's fine with you being bi, and he has a valid reason for not keeping in touch as much as you'd wanted. It certainly isn't because of any aversion to you. As for the girl, two things: how recently did you ask her out, and does she know you're bi? The best, realistic advice I can give you is this. You're 15. You're in high school. You're a teenager. You've already posted on here about other crushes (I think, unless I'm getting people mixed up... :s), and you're certainly going to rotate "love interests" really really quickly. Relationships at this age typically don't last very long either, again, due to both parties "changing interests". I'm not saying you shouldn't have a relationship. I'm proposing you do yourself a favour, save yourself a lot of energy and grief, and not go actively seeking one. It's hard to do when it seems like something really important, but don't let your life revolve around who you are/are not dating. Though, if you really want to handle them, you have three options: - Tell the crush you like them, to get an answer and end it for better or worse - Forget about them and move on, to save the friendship - Forever stay in this "crushing" mode until you decide that you don't like them any more
I came out to the girl in 7th grade, so two almost three years ago. And maybe I'll lose my crush for A but honestly it feels different with D. I don't want to assume anything more than it really is, but from his reactions that he's shown literally all summer, I just really want to hope that he's gay or at the very least bi.
Well, you can hope as much as you want, but you're probably only lying to yourself... like someone posted above, if he was gay/bi he would have taken the opportunity to tell you when you came out to him. And if he didn't then, he's either neither gay/bi, or so uncomfortable with it that he can't tell you. So, the question is: do you want a long, drawn-out, less painful hurt, or a quicker, immediate, possibly more painful hurt? I'm thinking Band-Aid effect; going for the quick route is probably better in the long run. But, that's tough to choose, and ultimately your call.
I really can't offer much advice, but to be honest, I envy you for being able to come out to him. That's something that, for me, is a very long time away if I don't grow up and take some more risks. Sorry, these games really suck for anyone. I feel the same about my guy, and I really hate having to go through this. I wish you the best of luck, and I really hope everything turns out well.
