So it's 1:30 am, and instead of sleeping, this is what I'm doing... Back to the point, I like this girl on two of my softball teams, a lot. I also liked her last year, and never fully got over her. But I'm so awkward around her. I mean I super shy and quiet around everyone, but I can at least talk. She makes me so nervous that I even have trouble talking to her when she talks first. I don't know how to change this and actually be able to talk to her like a normal person. I mean I see her every day for the next few months. I'd love to at least be able to be friends with her. I know she isn't gay (she could be bisexual, but I doubt it), but it would still be nice to talk and everything. And I just can't seem to do so. I've tried, it just seems impossible.
I admit that I had a problem like that back in high school. Basically I never got over it until I eventually became more outgoing and confidant. I talk with him every so often these days and it's not awkward at all. I guess it's just something that can you grow out of. Just something about being a teenagers makes us awkward. Everyone goes through it.
1. You are 13 years old. This degree of awkwardness is completely normal. 2. If you are seeing her every day for the next few months, it will probably get easier--at least, it will if you work on it every day, and don't just keep not doing anything about it. You can start small; instead of coming up with anything elaborate you plan on saying to her, you can just promise yourself that you will greet her by name and smile; especially at first, you don't need to do more than that--that's enough to make it clear that you are friendly towards her, which is the main thing. And just pay attention, so that in the future you can give her honest compliments about what she's good at in softball, and so that you learn what her other interests are, so that you can talk about those with her as well. When you have some things you've thought of to say to her or ask her about, just plan on one of them a day at first. Open-ended questions about things she's really interested in are the best; they will draw her into conversation and also make it clearly her turn to speak. Open-ended means that, rather than a yes-or-no answer, or a short one-sentence answer, the question requires a longer, more thoughtful answer. For example, instead of asking "How long have you been playing softball?" (potential answer: "About two years"), instead, you might ask, "How did you first get interested in softball?" (potential answer: "Well, when I was 9 my aunt took me to my first softball game, and I thought it was amazing!..." and the narrative might continue on from there.) If you try to come up with an open-ended question to ask her at least a couple times a week, you will soon get into conversations with her, and then you'll get a lot more comfortable.
I do get what you're saying. It's just I have a lot of trouble even talking to her. I tried all of last year, and barely anything was said by me. I mean she's super friendly and everything, I'm just completely shy, especially around her. But I guess not doing anything won't help at all, so I'll have to keep at it. Thanks
