...Simply put I don't want sex. TL;DR - I like boys but don't want to fuck them. Thoughts on why THE HELL not? So I know most of you are probably going to be like "no worries it's fine, you just don't want sex" but it's more complicated then that. I have my... Me time ( :K ) and when I do it's always to men. I like watching gay porn, it turns me on. I'm in no way sexually attracted to girls. BUT I SO GENUINELY DO NOT WANT SEX I DON'T EVEN KNOW. The thought of actually being with and touching another man is just... not an attractive idea to me. It seems almost gross. My friend (a girl) tells me about sex she has and explicitly states stuff about the guy (I'm not gonna get into what sort of stuff.. But you can imagine) and I gag almost every time. It's not the stuff about her that grosses me out, it's always the stuff about him. Like I said, I AM sexually attracted to men - but I reeeally don't want sex. Thoughts? P.S. thanks it advance, I don't usually get help here but I appreciate the time of those who do respond.
It's possible that you have some internalized homophobia that makes you feel disgusted. I mean, what you are describing isn't just a neutral, non-interested reaction--you react with disgust. So, my guess would be that you are gay, but you have also (unconsciously) internalized the negative images and ideas about gay people, so that when you think about it you are hit with an unpleasant ill-feeling, perhaps a wave of nausea. It's something you might want to work on with a counselor. If you can't see a counselor yet, just try to work on self-acceptance of your sexuality until you can. Aside from sex, how do you feel about the idea of dating a guy?
I'm not sure if I can be much help here, but I'll try. Instead of asking, "Why do I not want to do all these things with a guy," you could try asking, "What sorts of things would I want to do with a guy?" Even if your answers are just small stuff like 'holding hands' or 'sitting close together on the couch while watching a movie.' I wouldn't put too much thought into being turned off by your friend's descriptions. If one of my friends went into detail like that, I probably wouldn't like what I heard either (and then I would die of embarrassment).
I just wanted to say that you're not alone. That's exactly how I feel. I can get off to gay porn just fine, but I find the real act boring and unexciting. I'm fine with a gay relationship, but sex just doesn't seem to be in the cards for me. I don't really have any advice to offer you. Maybe find the right guy and jack off with him while watching porn?
Only you can answer the question but as others have put, I would say either - A - Internalized homophobia B - Asexuality
That might be internalized homophobia as was said before. In itself, the fact is it's 2 guys having sex. And then there are the emotions we attach to it, and finding it disgusting makes me think it's internalized homophobia. At least, that was the case for me...
I've considered this, but I didn't settle on it because I'm sexually attracted to men. So, I'm homosexual. As to the interalized homophobia; How do you lot reckon it could be that? Like, I'd be fine with having a relationship with a man, it's just not attractive at all to me to actually have sex with him... It's just a bizarre situation, that's why I'm looking for answers.
