I kind of spoke about this in my introduction post but I guess I thought more people would see it if I talked about it here. And I can give more details about the subject under the fitting category of Support and Advice. I'm bisexual. I've known for awhile. I've only ever done things with a guy though. I know I'm attracted to females. I've crushed on a few as well. The problem is I don't know how to move forward with them. I've always been the quiet, near anti social one in any crowd. The person everyone turns too. When I was in high school my circle of friends was large. I had different classes and activities. With each change in scene and new group of people. I don't have that luxury anymore. I haven't for awhile. I'm beginning to contemplate the fact I might just be more attracted to girls then guys. I thought this in the past. What if I only like guys at all because its expected? What if it's just another way of avoiding the truth? I guess I think this a lot at times when my brothers tease me. My older brother, he's perfetly okay with me being bisexual. He was one of the first people to know and said he knew all along. Me and him go back and forth with the bantering but sometimes he says things like "butch". One little word and some how my smile turns fake and I internally flinch. It's like he's telling me something I don't yet want to admit too. My young brother is Autistic among other things so I don't think he fully understand the concept of being bisexual. He doesn't fully understand the taunts he throws at me either. Things like "you're gay" or "queer". Sometimes he goes "Ill you like girls." And he's not saying it to be nasty, he just has the mind of a child. You know that whole "kooties" thing but still it cuts. My mom asks me all the time if I even like guys. She supports me as well but sometimes I question myself too. I can't figure it all out for sure because... well I don't know any non straight girls. I used too. My aunt is gay but we don't hang out anymore (she's only a few years older than me). I know a total of three other people. One is gay... in a relationship. The other two are bisexual. One is in a relationship and the other is 17 - in and out of a relationship. Not exactly anyone who can help me figure out the confusion in my head. How am I supposed to know for sure? I've tried talking to my mom about it but I think she thinks I was joking or just looking for an excuse to break up with my boyfriend. It seems I can be a great friend to guys but I can't do girlfriend. It never feels right. How am I supposed to deal with these attractions that can't or wont be reciprocated? I don't know what to do when it's like I'm the only girl who likes girls out of the people I know. To make matters more difficult (or perhaps easier)... I don't have many girl friends. I know lots of girls but we don't really talk. Me being such a tom boy and all. We never have much to talk about.
Hey it can be tough when you dont know any other LGBT people but EC is a great place to come and bounce ideas off people. I think you need to try not to stress about whether or not you like guys, maybe you do maybe you dont, even if you do, it would be possible that you never date another guy in your life, or you could be bisexual and never date a girl, so try not to stress. I dont know about your situation in terms of are you at school or college, are you going to uni soon? If possible my best advice would be to look for an LGBT group in your area, this way you would be able to meet other people going through these things and you could make some friends and have fun in the process.
Hi there and welcome to EC. If meeting other girls who are bisexual or gay is something you think you need to do - either to meet potential girlfriends or to at least talk about things wtih them, then you likely need to expand your circle of friends. As silverhalo suggested, you should be looking for some kind of LGBT group. Either one at school or one in your community. They likely exist, depending on where you live. Maybe there's a local PFLAG chapter that you could attend. Before you're going to be attractive to anyone else, you need to be comfortable in your own skin. Hanging out here will certainly help too. It did for me.
