Ok, I'm gay for a fact, and i've recently come to terms with it. I know my whole life that I was gay, but I spent like 14 years trying to cover it up (i'm 15 now) by dating girls that I tricked my mind into thinking I had feelings for. So, like I said, i'm certain that i'm gay, and lookin back at all my 'relationships' (they were really all pitiful) i realized that I didn't like any of those girls foreals, and that i was just tryin to hide from the truth. Recently, i met this girl when i went to science fair (well, i kinda already knew her) but on the trip to Athens, i got to know her more: and long story short, I developed strong feelings for her. I asked her out, and she said yes and all (and she's a really shy girl. I'm the first person to ask her out) and i really do like her, and she's the first girl that i've liked. So here's the thing: my head is all over the place. After just recently coming to terms with being gay and fully accepting it as a part of me, this just feels so weird! I'd always looked at myself with a man in the future and I always pictured myself walking with another guy and all that, and the thought appeals to me, but I really like her, and i'd choose her over being gay without a doubt. I just want some advice and some other perspectives of the situation. I mean, I don't ever put a label on myself, but it just sounds weird, ya know: I'm a gay guy, but i have a girlfriend. Heh, it just sounds crazy. But y'all gimmie some opinions and comments... I just need to talk to someone because i've got nobody to talk to at home, and the one friend i can talk to, well, he just doesn't get it... He thinks I'm 'sick' or just fed up with being rejected by girls too much, but that's a whole nother story...
There's quite a difference between sexual attraction and romantic attraction. How do you feel about ever having sex with a girl (her)? Does it gross you out? Turn you on? How about with a guy?
What he said. If you aren't attracted to having sex with women, relationships with them will never really be fulfilling.
You say you're 94% gay - is the other 6% straight? If you really like her and think you have a future with her maybe it would be worthwhile to try. Otherwise, there's always the close friends option I think this is also important to consider!
It could be that you simply don't have this all figured out yet. And that's OK. Some people (like me) took way longer to figure out their orientation. The fact of the matter is that you haven't spent 14 of your 15 years "covering up" the fact that you're gay. You couldn't possibly have known at the age of 1 that you were gay. So I'm thinking that this isn't totally resolved. And that's OK. At 15 you're not about to get married to this girl - nor are you robbing her of the opportunity to be in a relationship with a potential life partner. So see how this feels for you.
Thanks y'all. I dunno, i haven't ever thought of sex with a woman, but i have thought of it with a guy... Sex with a girl doesn't necessarily gross me out, but it just gives me a neutral feeling, like I just don't ever think of it or ever saw it happening. But, I'm just gonna let things roll and see where the cards land in the end. I guess only time can tell. But it just feels like I'm neglecting a whole other side of me. One side is screaming "this is wrong! You're supposed to be with a guy!" and the other side is screaming "But you care dearly for her, don't you?! And you wanna be with her! So just be with her!" Ugh, I feel like a walking contradiction...
If you like her, you like her. Simple as that. And there is nothing wrong with liking someone that you like. I say just go with it. Maybe it will help to think of it like this. If you love rock and roll music, but hate jazz music, then you might be very surprised if you one day find a jazz song that you like better than most rock and roll. That doesn't mean you are into jazz music now, or that you don't like rock and roll just as much as you did before. You just happen to really like that one song now. Hope that made sense/helped.
Hey, thanks man, that actually did help a lot. I already decided that I'd definitely go with her, but I liked that jazz/rock n roll reference. Thanks man
