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Who on EC believes HOCD exits?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by hayyyyy, Apr 28, 2012.

  1. hayyyyy

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    Reply with your answer and any justification!

    (I personally don't know)

    From Wikipedia -
    HOCD: recurrent doubt over one's sexual orientation (also called HOCD or "homosexual OCD"). People with this theme display a very different set of symptoms than those actually experiencing an actual crisis in sexuality. One major difference is that people who have HOCD report being attracted sexually towards the opposite sex prior to the onset of HOCD, while homosexual people whether in the closet or repressed have always had such same sex attractions for life-long.[7] The question "Am I gay" takes on a pathological form. Many people with this type of obsession are in healthy and fulfilling romantic relationships, either with members of the opposite sex, or the same sex (in which case their fear would be "Am I straight?")

    From Urban Dictionary -
    HOCD is a form of obsessive compulsive disorder that deals with one's sexual identity. It's based around the fear that one might become or somehow is homosexual, with this notion going against all rational and actuality of that person's sexual identity as a heterosexual. In part, the fears are that of impulse and loss of control, where one feels overwhelming anxiety around the intrusive thoughts of being sexual and passionate with another member of the same sex.

    This is not at all the same as closeted gays who may be afraid of social repercussions. It is not a fear of rejection by members of the same sex, but rather is a fear of the attraction itself. Healthy homosexuality and heterosexuality are based around positive feelings, whereas the feelings encompassing HOCD are quite negative and do not revolve around wholesome fulfillment. Instead, they are based around insecurities and the mind playing off these insecurities to falsify reality to the afflicted person. The person will feel an urge of sorts that just "doesnt fit" with themselves, and it causes utmost anxiety, confusion, frustration, and pain. However, the urge/thought does not go away and the anxiety persists, leading to illogical rationalization and depression, among many other negative side-effects stemming from being afflicted with the intrusive thoughts.

    For those unsure about what this feels like, imagine getting the impulse to jump off a cliff. You're standing at the edge, and your body and mind scream...
     
  2. Chip

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    There is zero credible evidence for HOCD. This is something the wingnuts in the religious right have cooked up as a way for closeted people to convince themselves they are straight.

    No credible psychology or sexuality journal or any of the major associations (APA, APA, or NASW) recognize HOCD, nor does the DSM, the manual of all major psychological disturbances.
     
  3. socalguitarguy

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    Chip: That's an interesting take. While HOCD might not be an actual entry in the DSM, why is it so hard to believe that some people with OCD might irrationally obsess about the possibility that they are gay? From what I know about OCD it can make you fear things without really having a rational basis for them. I've done a search through academic journals before about obsessive rumination about sexual orientation and there have been studies done. Unfortunately I can't remember results off the top of my head, but I'll have to look into that again.
     
  4. Chip

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    There are certainly people who obsess about whether or not they're gay. This may or may not be part of an overarching diagnosis of OCD. But the idea that there's a specific condition in which people obsess about being gay simply isn't supported in the literature by any credible evidence (i.e, evidence from legitimate, credible researchers that isn't severely biased or flawed) that I'm aware of.

    What one typically finds, as I alluded to above, is that the majority of people with so-called HOCD are either gay and in denial and looking for something to justify their denial, or, alternatively, have OCD or related attributes that are causing them to obsess... but such obsession is almost never exclusively about whether they're gay, unless they're in denial, if that makes sense.
     
  5. Confuse D

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    Hey there :slight_smile:
    I'm a little late to the party but... I still want to give my opinion :wink:
    Well, it might not exist in "the book", but think about it, no "new" obsessions are instantly put there.
    Homosexuality was still considered an illness about 30 years ago i think, which of course it isn't!
    There are many sub-types of "pure-o" as this kind of OCD has been called (no visual compulsions, just mental), in there are, Harm OCD (fear of hurting someone), ROCD (fear you don't love enough your romantic partner, child,etc...), and many others! OCD is just a cruel mofo that clings to whatever it can; it's an self-destructive mental disbalance. I read a heated discussion between you and another guy, of course, he was trying to impose the disease and went as far as insulting another member, but in his "argument", I saw something that I found funny, he called it a doorknob OCD or something like that, which of course doesn't exist! But there are people who actually do "need" to touch door knobs, it's their manifestation. But, I'm sort of drifting away from what I wanted to say... When the now listed OCD types I listed above were "new" to the psychologists, they could have diagnosed them as simple anxiety or as a psychopath. As homosexuality is still being "researched", it is a new topic, but HOCD is capable of existing. The H is just added for slang and easy recognition among the web or with a psychologist.
    Of course... there is always the chance one might be actually gay or bi or whatever, but HOCD is also a posibility.
    I think I could be suffering from that or could be bisexual or even bicurious! Just let me tell you that the mental pain one suffers, might as well be similar, not the same, as when one finds out he/she is gay.
    What we suspect tells us appart is that when we are "cool", we think and know that we are straight as an arrow, well... total straightness doesn't exist, but you get my point. We also feel sexual and romantic attraction towards the opposite sex now (even though it's dampened somewhat) and before, and when we think of the same sex, yes we think they are good looking, but when we get anxious, sad, etc; any not-good emotion, we feel this kind of attraction (?) that makes us sad. We also can't feel a sexual/emotional bond that goes beyond friendship or envy. But hey! I'm not discarting that we could be repressed, it's just that deep within us, we know we are not.
    I might have it I think beecause my self steem is almost in the total darkness and as I was raised by my mom alone, I had some "girly" things according to my goddamned classmates like not liking sports, or not being irrespectful towards women and being extra sensitive... I'm scared of the posibility of being gay, yes, even though I recognise it's nothing wrong, but as OP says, it's an irrational fear. I might be, yes, I'm trying to accept the possibility, but I keep getting drawn towards girls as I've always have.
    This fear of being attracted romantically to guys is only that, a fear, but I fear it might become true.
    I think I've had other possible obsessions which I just thought were paranoia, and that's the reason I think HOCD is possible.
    Anyways... I'm sorry if any of this bothered you, or you disagree with any of this. I know I also need more information, but from my 4-6 daily hours of research, I think I can have a word on this :slight_smile: good day and may the force be with you :grin: I'm open for any discussion, either here or PM.
    Kzyol
     
  6. Ticklish Fish

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    so why does HOCD have a wikipedia entry and not like cats or internet or cookies? are those obsession not serious and sexual enough? (or religions)

    (I mean, if you have to question if you are gay or not, you might not be 100% straight...)
     
    #6 Ticklish Fish, Dec 7, 2012
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  7. Confuse D

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    Oh, of course, we humans aren't 100% straight I know. What's possibly going on with me are the damned teen-hormones but my mind just can't handle the "what if..." part.
    Before this possible type of OCD we are discussing arose, I was researching of WHY did I had all these intrusive thoughts of killing, maiming, etc... the people I know. I felt like a god-damned serial killer of my loved ones and it was destroying me. Of course I'm not one, but the "what if..." part of that, was simply overwhelming. Before I was sure I had appendicitis and would die when I reached 15 years, before that, I was sure I had a hernia that would need surgery (which I'm terrified of), etc.
    Right now, I wish I could say I was gay or straight as this anxiety is killing me and all I want is an answer... a solid answer that I know I will never be able to achieve which is mentally excrusiating. The thing is that, when I try to be gay, my mind just screams in agony and I don't understand why, as I'm accepting I'm gay, what I'm always thinking of now. I know being gay ISN'T BAD, but my mind just want's to be in the opposite of my thinking. It's an infinite loop of agony.
    The reason there are not entries in wikipedia i think is that how would an OCD obsession of cats be like? The thing of OCD is that it mainly clings on taboo things or things that endanger the self. Mainly sexual, religious or that have to do with health.
    Of course... there might be some kind of cat or cookies or internet obsessions but I believe getting them in an OCD status could be quite hard. For example, maaaaybe in an amish community, there could be an internet related obession, or in a family that hates cats some kind of OCD related thing could arise. It's a very versatile thing.
    I sometimes hope I don't have it, as an answer would quickly be given, but then, it comes all over again this "what if..." nonsense.

    Again, I'm open for responses, hope nothing I wrote offended anyone reading this and if it did, I'm very sorry, it wasn't my intention and I'm willing to give a personal apology.

    Kzyol
     
  8. Ettina

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    I think it's a real condition. It's just a form of OCD.

    Incidentally, from what I've read, this obsession only arises in people who wouldn't be accepting of themselves if they are gay. And if the person gets to the point where they can accept themselves either way, the obsession switches to something else. It's all about the fear of being something you find unacceptable.
     
  9. I believe it exists. Like people before me have said, it is just a type of OCD. OCD manifests itself in different ways; some people obsess about contamination and germs, some people obsess about causing harm to others, and some people, apparently, obsess about their sexuality.
     
  10. justinf

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    It doesn't exist.

    There's OCD, and that might manifest in obsessing over your sexuality, and you can call that particular obsession HOCD if you want, but "HOCD" on its own -- without any other obsessions; without "regular" OCD -- doesn't exist.

    I think we'd do everyone a huge favor if we agreed on that.
     
  11. Deaf Not Blind

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    i agree with that.if you have obsessions then it could take on sexual questioning obsession too as it is in media a lot. if you have no other obsessions it is not true for you. idk if i have obsessions, i might, or it could just be i am a passionate person. I get really into things at times and like to study it. Like politics, religion, deafness and now queerness.
     
  12. WilliamM

    WilliamM Guest

    I dont believe that i exists i mean where are all the recorded cases off this happening?
     
  13. Equalist

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    OCD is not a term that can be thrown around so easily, and applying it to sexuality is absurd. The disorder is already taken out of context and applied to situations that are no where near as severe as an actual case of OCD. If this "HOCD" existed, it would be debilitating and pose a threat to one's health. Sexuality crises are usually caused by denial and delusions (thank an ignorant society for that one), and while they can affect somebody rather intensely, attaching OCD to the problem is a joke.
     
  14. jvn95

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    HOCD is not real as a stand alone condition. I hate seeing people on the internet saying they have it.

    If you have real OCD, and are obsessing over sexuality, then there. But HOCD... just. No.

    It's called denial.
     
  15. mangolassi

    mangolassi Guest

    I need to get this off my chest...

    First of all I was never diagnosed with OCD, but I am 99% that I had pure O (intrusive thoughts) in my teen years. I had many different themes sexual , religious, self harm eg. suddenly thinking about what happens if I jump off this train platform when the train comes. I had no control over these thoughts, they just popped into my head. Some of my themes made me sit their paralyzed with fear.

    One of my earliest themes was sexuality (HOCD.) I was 14 at the time and their was this girl that I admired. Anyways one day these sexual though started flashing into my head,and it shook me to the core. They were not pleasant at all and filed me with such anxiety.

    At that time I did not know what homosexuality was, it hadn't even occurred to me that such relationships existed:icon_redf. Once I learned what homosexuality was and that it was normal those thoughts went away and that was that.

    In my experience HOCD does exist, as a sub type of OCD. Something so random and anxiety inducing can't be a part of ones sexuality. Can it?

    It's ironic that I ended up with a different orientation from the norm (asexual.)

    .........
    OK yes when you take into consideration my bi curiosity, my fantasizes about same sex relationships, my interest in queer media, looking at lgbt websites etc You could say their is a bit of contradiction. But this is different, it isn't part of my OCD so to speak.
     
    #15 mangolassi, Jan 25, 2013
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  16. Ianthe

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    mangolassi:

    HOCD is a layman's term (not a clinical diagnosis) used by people in the OCD community to refer to people with OCD who specifically have an obsession about their sexuality. Aside from that, it does not exist. OCD is a mental illness. If you believe you have a mental illness, you should seek a professional diagnosis.

    Yes, many gay people experience extreme anxiety when they first have sexual feelings. Even if you didn't know about homosexuality, you were exposed to the social norms around heterosexuality, and your own feelings being different from what was obviously expected may have caused your anxiety. 14 would be a normal age for the onset of overt sexual feelings.

    It is possible that you are repressing your sexual feelings. Many gay people do that. I don't think I ever actually used the word asexual, because I think I just avoided looking at the topic too closely, but there was a long stretch in my twenties where I just "wasn't sure I could even have those kinds of feelings for someone."

    My family isn't homophobic or anything, so I would have thought that I would be fine with it if I were gay. But I wasn't really, and I had totally repressed all my romantic and sexual feelings.

    The asexual community is aware that this happens sometimes, and that people who have repressed their feelings sometimes identify as asexual.
     
  17. OMGWTFBBQ

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    yes, l've read all about it.

    l don't know. OCD is weird in that often people with it really will fear something that has NO basis in reality whatsoever, that could include orientation. And once the thought is there they can become very obsessed with it, obviously lol. There's also "harm" ocd when a person fears they will do terrible things even if they don't want to or have no reason to, it seems kind of like that and they usually never end up doing those things.

    But...l think "homosexual anxiety' exists, l don't think it should be a seperate diagnosis. That's just weird.

    And if a person with HOCD doesn't have actual OCD too l might just think they were gay. because why would they obsess about it? So l would think all the need is the OCD label.
     
    #17 OMGWTFBBQ, Jan 25, 2013
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  18. mangolassi

    mangolassi Guest

    No I don't think so, because before I started to identify as asexual I identified as straight. I liked looking at good looking guys (still do). In my mind that meant sexual attraction. It took me ages to realize that it was purely aesthetic attraction. I've never really had that for women apart from Ashley from South of Nowhere, but every straight women had a crush on her. If I was bi/gay wouldn't I at least feel some sort of aesthetic attraction towards women?

    If you don't mind me asking how did you come to discover your ture feelings and desires?
     
    #18 mangolassi, Jan 25, 2013
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  19. Ianthe

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    The girl I had a crush on in high school appeared on my computer screen through the magic of Facebook, and reminded me that I was so capable of those feelings (I had completely repressed a bunch of memories of her).

    And, you know, almost everyone used to identify as straight, until they didn't any more. :icon_wink

    I mean, what you are saying is still that you didn't have any sexual interest in men, even when you thought you did, and your description of your response to the girl at 14 definitely seems like you had overtly sexual thoughts about her.
     
  20. mangolassi

    mangolassi Guest

    I still don't think it was genuine sexual feelings. If it had been an isolated incident than maybe I could agree, but it wasn't. I had a whole host of other OCD type thoughts and feelings at that time too.
     
    #20 mangolassi, Jan 25, 2013
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