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Long Distance relationship

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by inevertoldyou, Apr 28, 2012.

  1. So...I went on a date today with this really amazing woman. It's scary how much we have in common. We're already planning on a 2nd meeting/date next time it's possible. I feel so great about this. My immediate concern is, for the next few months, we will be living about six hours away from each other. Once I moved we'll be an hour and a half away, that's much more manageable. I really like her and already I could see this being something special. How can I hold it together for the next few months with several hundred miles between us and only getting to see her maybe once or twice? What are the "rules" of a long distance relationship?
     
  2. Gravity

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    The rules, quite frankly, are whatever you want them to be. Long-distance relationships are hard, but doable, especially if there's some sort of goal in sight (like moving closer together). I would just be very clear with each other about what you're going to need to make it through the next few months - what kind of contact, how frequent contact will be, what the parameters of the relationship will be, and so forth. It's very easy to get paranoid or worried, so the less surprises you have in the time you'll be apart, the better.

    You might also think of things to do "together" while you're apart. Like watch a movie together over the phone, or cook the same dinner together over the phone. Like any other relationship, you'll need to set aside time for you two to spend together, so plan on something you two can depend on.

    And visit as often as possible. If you don't have a credit card that gives you free airline miles as a bonus, look into that and get one. :slight_smile: Some of them can be very profitable!

    In the end though, just be as honest as possible (again, as with any relationship, but especially so here). Tell each other what you need, how you're feeling, and give each other space to be a little less than perfect. The time will go by faster than you think.
     
  3. In the interim we have already talked about trips back and forth and made some plans. Thanks for your input.
     
  4. TheGreyMan

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    I agree with Gravity - With technology now, it's much easier than it used to be. You guys can maybe simultaneously begin a movie on Netflix and talk on Skype or maybe just video chat and IM each other rather often.

    Just to your best to keep them in your thoughts, too.(That's dumb advice - they probably are already) It'll help reinforce it and make seeing them so much more exciting.
     
  5. Gravity

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    It's actually not all that dumb. The further along things get, the more the tendency is to forget that a long-distance relationship can sometimes need constant re-enforcement. Not forgetting to remind them that you still care about them and the distance isn't changing your feelings is a good thing to do, but it can be easy to let it slip your mind some days.
     
  6. Well thanks everyone, I appreciate your input:slight_smile: