Hey all, Got a bit of an issue. I'm a first year law student - I love the course, and aside from one thing, the atmosphere is great. That one thing though is starting to get harder and harder to deal with; the thinking of 90% of the population of students (and some lecturers) seems to be incredibly archaic regarding sexuality. It's normally not such an issue, but a lot of the banter now we're past the excessively-polite-because-we-don't-know-eachother-yet part is homophobic, to the point of "What is wrong with those people?" levels. Only in the last day or two has it gotten that extreme, but it's starting to grate. Last I checked, being gay wasn't something you could 'catch' (said sincerely, incredibly enough), nor was it 'unnatural', 'weird', 'sub-human' or any of the number of other words thrown around. So being in a study group with an African girl who thinks it's an illness, and a strongly anti-gay Mormon guy is getting a little trying. I know it'd be opening the door to a whole lot of abuse. I know I'd likely get the reputation of being 'the faggot'. I know it could actually hurt career prospects, given that this is the mindset of the field in general. But goddamn I want to turn around and call them on it. Actually starting to contemplate it as a genuine course of action. I don't know whether I'm asking for advice or just venting, but any one who wants to jump in, please do.
How comfortable are you with yourself? Are you comfortable enough with defending your sexuality to others? I'm not sure what type of law you are going to be practicing, but I imagine being a lawyer it is good to have a thick skin and some sharp debating skills. There certainly might be times in your future in which you have to stand before a group of hostile people and defend something or someone. I don't really know what else to tell you. Your choices are pretty much: transfer somewhere else and hope its more accepting, speak up to defend yourself, speak to the school administration, or remain silent.
That's got to be rough. I would have thought that institutions of 'higher learning' would be more inclusive than that... But I would have thought that there were elements of the legal community that were extremely accepting. The court case over Prop 8 (I watched that Youtube play that reinacted the court room proceedings) was won by two high profile lawyers who had previously been adversaries over the Florida election results of Bush vs. Gore. So two of the most high profile lawyers in the US came together (presumably across party lines) to fight for equality. I've got to think that you'd be just fine being a lawyer and being out. But I guess that depends on where you hope to practice. If you're going to set up shop on main street, deep south USA, then maybe not. It really does come down to how far out on a limb do you want to go in your studies. I think I'd prefer to be miserable because I was an outcast than to be miserable because I was constantly biting my tongue regarding these homophobic slurs. But that's hypothetical for me - reality for you.
It depends on what you need to do to feel safe, but I'd say go for it. Besides, I think you might find other LGBT law students who were glad someone else is helping to make space for them.
If you think it could hurt you, I wouldn't come out to them at all. But you have a right to not be bothered, so I think you should tell them that it offends you. I did that before I realized that I'm bi. Now, when I deal with things like that, (if it's none of that person's business) I just tell them that I know people who are homosexual, and I'd appreciate it if they could keep their ignorance to themselves.
"Unnatural" "Sickness" "Sub-Human" "Contagion" yeah, these people are utterly, absolutely hopeless. Do not think for a second you will change their minds, even if you attempt to show them that you are a good person, their friend, and gay. Even if the revelation of your sexuality makes their jaws drop, and incites an apology or two, fact remains, they will still feel the same way. It seems they are fueled by religion and culture, and they are just happy to hate people who are different from them. They will ignore their own personal failings and shortcomings, and only project hatred onto others, and if they all feel the same way (and it sounds like they do), they will just feed off one another. You have 2 choices. Come out, call them on their hatred and distance yourself from them. Or fly under the radar until you no longer are forced to be in their company, and then tell them who you are, and how badly they need to grow up. Stick it to them as you walk out a success in your course.
Super confused has a good idea. Tell them you know people who are gay, and then you can discuss it and defend gay people without coming out yourself. When they inevitably do ask about your sexuality, you can lie, you can tell them it's none of their business (which is true), or if you're feeling daring you can say you're gay.
Why would it be an issue in law school? Pretty scary to think that the judges of tomorrow could be so narrow minded. I might be going to law school next year myself, eek. :S
Hey all, only saw the replies just now, so sorry about the late response. I'm starting to think flying under the radar isn't much of an option; been a week and I'm losing sleep, not because I'm hurt or scared, but because I'm plain angry. I'm not so opposed to running on my own that I can't defend this, but the results could be ugly. That said, screw it. I think my basic self respect is more important to me than playing nice with these bastards. I've got absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Chances are it'll come up again tomorrow; if anything significant happens, I'll report back. Thanks guys.
