:help: I am so confused right now... even more than I was before. Please, help me, give me some advice, guys :tears: :help: I know I am not straight, but I haven't found out who exactly I am so far. I thought I was a lesbian, but I kind of like guys :icon_sad: I dress, act and do basically everything as a boy. Many people (that don't know me) think I am a boy actually. The problem is, I would only go out with a boy if I were one (I would like to have a relationship with a gay guy). I like girls too, I have been in love with one for more that two years now. I watch Glee and Kurt is so hot, I'm starting to fall in love with him and because of him, I have even greater desire to be a boy. One of my friends (whom I know through the internet) is a transsexual and he told me that there are FtM who date men after their surgery. The problem is - I don't want a surgery. I envy my girl-classmates who have small breasts, but I really don't want to change my body like this... What should I do? I guess I will just stay in "the wrong body" and try to overcome it, but I am not sure whether I can be perfectly happy with that... Please give me some advice on what should I do :help:
Hey sorry but I don't have any advice for u, but I know how u feel. I feel like u do, I act and dress like a guy (it's like I have the mind and hormones of a male teenager) and i would also date a guy if I were male, atleast there is someone else in my shoes. As far as surgery goes I'm half half, like I kinda want to be a guy, so that I can look how I feel on the inside but the male body isn't particularly attractive to me at all, it grosses me out really. And I know if I did change that I would lose alot of ppl in my life (family and friends). I'm here if u need someone to relate to. Best of luck xx
You don't have to change anything you don't want too. You are who you are, and you don't have to change it! The only reason trans people go through with genital reassignment surgeries is because it is important to them, they feel they need those surgeries to be in the proper body. If you don't feel you need them, don't want them, then you shouldn't do them. They are not without a cost, and I am not speaking strictly cash money. As a gay man, I can tell you that there is more to a man than a penis. I've heard one trans person describe it as, 'It's not about whats in your pants, its about what is in your heart and head.' I also know that there are some gay men who'd have no issue with the fact that you had a vagina instead of a penis; especially if they identified as exclusive tops. In fact, that might actually turn them on and appeal to them a great deal. Will there be some gay men who wouldn't be able to get past that fact? I won't lie to you, there will be some who would struggle with it. But that doesn't mean everyone will. What is ultimately important is not what other people think, but what you feel and think. It is important that you strive to be as authentic to yourself as possible, and not make concessions for what you believe other people think or want from you.
Thank you for your wise advice, Aldrick! (*hug*) As I said, I like girls too, so I could be with a girl, but I must say that what you said about gay men made happy :icon_wink Thanks!
Aldrick is absolutely right! There are plenty of gay/bi/queer guys who will be with a transgender man with or without surgery. You don't have to have any surgeries you don't want to in order to find a partner (or partners...). I identify with what you wrote a lot. I lived somewhat as a lesbian in my teens because I was in my female body and had crushes on girls. However, I had even more crushes on boys. Problem was, the last thing I wanted was to be with them as a girl and the kind of guys I liked usually weren't interested in females. Just want to let you know you're not alone and that there are plenty of people out there who will date guys like us! Best of luck!
