biphobia

I don't think you should put all your beliefs into this one report... Its weird because this is the first time I have ever heard of bisexuals being discriminated against by both straight and gay communities. So who exactly conducted the study? Who were the participants? It could be from a very narrow sample size so the results could be wrong.

Well, I have no problem with bisexuals, and I'm pretty sure that everyone here will agree with me. Have you actually experienced any discrimination for being bisexual? I think you should be happy with who you are to be honest (*hug*)

 

Bisexuality is something the lesbian and gay community is sometimes really bad on and has not been taken to task nearly enough.

I would recommend that you be honest about your bisexuality with your partners. That way, they will trust you more, you'll feel better about it, and if they react badly, then you'll just have learned really early that the relationship wouldn't have worked anyway.

But I recognize this advice doesn't help the times when someone says something hurtful to you. (*hug*)

Negativity towards bisexuals is extremely common. In some ways, I think the lesbian and gay community is actually worse, because you expect homophobic crap from the outside anyway. Here's some hurtful crap bisexuals don't expect from the lesbian and gay community but do experience:

1) Being called traitors,
2) Being called liars,
3) Being called not courageous enough to come out "all the way",
4) Being told they haven't found themselves yet,
5) Being told they "enjoy heterosexual privilege", (that's a goodie)
6) Being told they are inherently more promiscuous
7) Having to deal with partner distrust over getting dumped for a person of the opposite sex,
8) Being told they are the HIV bridge to the straight community.

My all-time favorite? Bisexual man: "So I just thought I should let you know that I'm bisexual." Girlfriend: "Do I need to get tested?"

 

Above poster said it so right.

Bisexual and Pangendered people are being discriminated against for so many reasons that I can't even believe people could think are valid. And for the OP, I've been having that same hatred for my sexuality. I've always wanted to just be straight or lesbian. I just see that everything in life would be so much harder being bi.

But, like Lad123 said, there are supportive people out there, don't get get me wrong

 

Yes, people do say rather nasty things about bisexual people, and try to convince us we're gay, or straight, or all kinds of nonsense. The key thing to remember is that it is nonsense. We bisexual people are no more promiscuous than straight or gay people, we are not liars or traitors, and as far as I know we're more careful than straight people (on average) about safe sex.

I'm happy about being pansexual, it means I can experience more different kinds of relationships than if I were gay or straight. On the other hand I'm genderqueer, so I'm not even sure what gay would mean. Would I prefer other genderqueer people?

 

I don't know, would you? :icon_wink

I actually prefer bisexual and pansexual people because I don't have to educate them on these issues.

 

I'd just say I'm attracted to human beings, to avoid the label. But to each is own ^.^

 

The response I get when I tell guys that I'm bi is, "that's hot."

No. No, it's not. It's not "hot"; it's a part of who I am, and you saying, "that's hot" is degrading and disrespectful. As is the assumption that I'll jump into bed with anyone, or that I'll participate in a three-way. :bang:

I would only do sexual things with someone I care about. And love doesn't depend on gender...not for me, anyway.

I'm really ready to just start flipping sh:***:t every time someone does this and pulls this garbage.

It also makes me want to scream and cry. :tears:

 

Im bisexual n I have felt that bash on both sides but there supporters as well

 

Now that's not!









Okay, just kidding. But it reminds me, I only brought up the shared stuff and some stuff unique to men. Bi and pan women have their own set of crap they have to deal with, like being objectified and hypersexualized. And called whores and sluts.

 

I don't think it's about what community we are in, us as humans are on this earth together. I really think this whole LGBT, 'Gay Community' etc. is really demoralising and we should all wake up and realise that we're in this together, regardless of our sexuality.

Nobody hates you for being bisexual, you could be in love with a man or a woman, but a straight or gay individual could be sleeping with a different person every night of the week. Liking both genders does not make you any more of a 'slut' than anyone else - everyone is capable of that.

Only you know who your are, being bisexual is one part of you and if someone actually hated you for that, they're not worth knowing in the first place.

 

It's extremely common. In fact the only genuine orientation-related -phobia i have encountered was biphobia, from a male friend's ex-boyfriend that decided to engage in a tirade against me for 'keeping one foot in the closet', as he put it. He reasoned that i was too afraid to be gay so decided to be bisexual instead. I had a girlfriend at the time, but that didn't seem to matter.

I guess he was afraid when he came out, and happens to be one of those "as for me, so for all" people who assumes that the motivations driving him also drive everyone else.

He was also a dipshit though, his homosexuality was neither here nor there, my entire group of friends referred to him as 'jerkface' not long after this, because of this and other incidents.

The point is, someone's orientation has little bearing on what prejudices they will decide to hold. Anyone is potentially liable to hold prejudices against bisexual people, including gay people or straight people.

 

No thank you for posting.

Honestly, I can`t begin to describe how much reading these posts helps my confidence and in general makes me feel that much better.

I have experienced this as well and most interestingly enough I have actual experienced EVERY comment posted by Pret Allez above. EVERY ONE! And did I mention I only started coming out as bi within the past 6 months. It is just nice to see posts by others so I don`t feel cray cray.

When I was growing up I tried to deny the fact I was bi -- bouncing back and forth between trying to make myself decide gay or straight because that`s the way it has to be. And for all those out there in the community who think it is ``easier`` to be bisexual think again. You are constantly being called into question about whether or not you are actually still just half closeted.

I think it can be a different experience between men and women too. Women get the whole, that`s hot lets have a threesome. In general people think they are just straight and having fun. Whereas us men get, you just have accepted yourself yet, implying we are really gay and have other motives for labeling bisexual. Both are equally bad.

Anyway enough rant. THANK YOU ALL again for posting because it is posts like these which give me hope for myself.

 

I came out as bi when I first came out, and later gay when I was older.. though I think I am leaning more towards bi now... I pretty much said I was gay and foced myself more or less to be gay because of what my friends would think or say. Or have already said..

Anyway my close friends didn't believe I was bi and didn't say much on it besides just denying it. My straight guy friends though were pretty much like "kay" and didn't say anything really about it.

I am still pretty confused about it. Some days I really like girls and am sexually turned on, others I am not and more often repulsed at the idea.

 

I hear ya! I am slowly learning to accept my bi-ness if you wanna call it that. I am like you it can take major swings. I am not gonna lie at this particular time I lean more towards men but I am not full gay in fact just yesterday I was on the bus and was so attracted to this woman I was trying to figure a way to strike up convo. I think the longer you accept it the better it probably gets.

It's like having weird mood swings. I have no idea who I will end up with in the end and I am slowly, baby steps but still progressing, accepting this!

 

I'm bi and I've got an amazing gay friend who supported me through everything andaccepts me for who i am! I have also however seen the darker side of the gay community and havebeen told it's easier for me, i'm still half stuck in the closet etc etc. Gay people have a hard time coming out of the closet and so think that we're finding it too tough so want to be accepted by both sides or they're the few peoplein the community who are spiteful and feel that we hage an easier time and that we're not as good as them because we're only half there (by the way i know this can be seen as offensive, i realise and apologise for that but i am literaply qouting what some of the few in the gay community who are biphobic have said)

I think that you should be whatever you are or whatever you choose, and anyone who tries to tell you you're lying just walk away ignorant people like that are just not worth your tim trust me!

On a small side note i am a bisexual woman who is going out with another bisexual woman, we are in love and would both never even think of cheating on each other so to all those biphobic people who say we naturally feel we should cheat here is proof that that ismost definitly not the case!...sorry got a bit carried away there XD be who you are and trust me, if you accept yourself for who you are then it won't be a problem, just another part of your life and you'll start to not really care what people think anymore XD i have

Good luck, i don't envy your choice but i hope you'll be happy with whatever your decision is x

 

You could say that you're queer or that you don't like labels, if you're uncomfortable with bisexual.

 

I love bisexuals! Always have, always will.

 

Another question I sometimes get is: Are you sure you're not gay/confused?

I mean, I know some people come out as bi first to later come out as gay, but if I wasn't sure I wouldn't tell you. People who know me should know that.

Indeed bophobia can be quite vicious and is rather unaddresses including in the LGBT community.