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My dog :(

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by BudderMC, May 12, 2012.

  1. BudderMC

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    I've had a dog (whom my username is nicknamed after) for... 7-8 years now, and like all pets, I love him tons. Throughout all of the stuff that happened over my teens (and even now, though I don't see him often since I'm at school), he's quite literally been the one who's always been there, always happy, etc. But I'm sure any of you who've had a pet know where I'm coming from.

    Anyways, my dad used to voluntarily do a lot of his caretaking and stuff. But since they split almost a year ago (geez, time flies), it's been really up-in-the-air. When my brother leaves next year for school, my mom doesn't want to keep the dog, and my dad can't take him in his apartment, so someone suggested we put him down. They think that his hips are going, which I'd tentatively agree with and his breed is supposedly known for that condition. If it's a case of necessity/what's better for him, then I agree he should be put down.

    But on the other hand, I want him to go to a vet or something and be examined first. Otherwise, it just seems like his supposedly bad hips is a scapegoat for nobody being able to take care of him... that isn't unreasonable, is it?

    The thing is though, if the vet says his health is declining but can be remedied and would cost a lot... I don't know what to do. I want to push to keep him because well, I love him, but that seems selfish when I won't be around to care for him either. And a lot of the reason my mom doesn't want to take care of him is because it's a hassle, which it understandably is... but it isn't a case of "she isn't physically capable" (as far as I know; she claims she isn't strong enough to walk him, but she isn't exactly a little old lady). She was also the one who brought him home (albeit on a semi-"impulse buy"), so I feel like she's shirking whatever responsibility she thought she'd have; bringing that up doesn't accomplish much though.

    It's not like I've lost pets before; we got stuck with two puppies before (totaling 3 dogs) and didn't have the space, time, or money to take care of them, so we had to put them up for adoption. But death... is a whole new territory.

    I don't know. I'm just kinda dumbfounded. And sad. :icon_sad:
     
    #1 BudderMC, May 12, 2012
    Last edited: May 12, 2012
  2. Emberblaze

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    I'm so sorry you gotta face this man. This is a situation I NEVER wanna be in because I'm a huge animal lover. Like, the only times I cry is when I lose a pet, and i've lost a good number of pets, like 6 cats and one dog. (We rescued most of the cats and most of em were already sick) and my dog just died of old age and I had her since 2000 when she was a new born so I cried my eyes out man.

    If I were in this situation, I would fight with all my power to try to keep him alive, but I just know money wouldn't allow...

    Ya know, I'm sorry, but I just can't give you any advise on this.... I myself wouldn't be able to make the decision if i was in the position..... Man, I'm just so sorry you have to deal with this....
     
  3. Jon56

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    I don't think you're being unreasonable, putting pets down is quite difficult. I'd say it wouldn't hurt to take him to the vet just to find out what their opinion might be. And if it turns out no one can take care of him, you could still potentially have someone adopt him (though it will be more difficult, some people do take in older dogs). You can even bring this situation up with the vet, they may be glad to help find him a new home.
     
  4. TyRawr

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    Made me cry a little, Ive been in your exact position, and I know how hard it is. My childhood companion was a yellow lab, and his hips went out, and then he had a stroke and we had to put him down, Its something that I struggled with allot. You may be right, that may be a scapegoat for the fact that nobody can take care of him, but the fact of the matter is nobody can take care of him. Perhaps look at fostering him somewhere that people can take care of him, or explore you other options. If you really dont want him to be put down then perhaps there is incentive to get really motivated to be able to support him.

    I know how sad it is. You can never replace your animals, but you can certianly love them while there here. Sending love, dear.
     
  5. Eleanor Rigby

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    I'm really sorry for you sweetheart (*hug*) I completely understand this is breaking your heart.
    Maybe you can suggest to your mom to look for a dog's shelter or for a foster home for him.
    Unfortunately, I can't really see any better solution at the moment.

    I wish you luck and a lot of courage if your dog had to be put down.
    (*hug*) Cécile
     
  6. BudderMC

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    Thanks guys, I'll definitely pitch the idea of finding him another home. I worry that it may end up being worse though; I mean, he's been with us his whole life... you can already tell he was sad when our dad left (and gets super excited when he comes by). I know nobody can know but him, but if his health is declining I don't want him to be miserable either. He never abandoned me; I don't want to do that to him.

    And now I feel silly for being so gushy over a dog. I know it's justified, but still :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Anyway, do older pets actually get adopted? I've never really heard stories either way, but if it does happen that'd be awesome.
     
  7. Dominic

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    Don't feel silly for feeling gushy. And about people adopting older dogs: My family adopted my dog in 2008 and he was 8 years old. We had to put him down a few weeks ago because his hips were failing and his heart was failing.
    (*hug*)
     
  8. Mlpguy88

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    (*hug*) It's okay, older pets get adopted all the time. The younger ones just get more publicity. Maybe you could talk to a neighbor about taking your dog, so it wouldn't be such a drastic change.
     
  9. Atticus

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    My last golden retriever, Sunny, was ten years old when we had her put down. She had hip dysplasia which bothered her, but we ultimately lost her to cancer, probably of the thyroid. Throughout her life, to make her more comfortable, we had her on a powder arthritis medication, which relieved much of her hip pain. You could probably find something similar (as I recall it wasn't very expensive and lasted a long time) for your dog, or even some arthritis pills for your dog which can be purchased at pet supply stores and are very effective and less costly than prescription medication.

    Would it be out of possibility for a friend to take your dog in until you can find your own place? I see that others have mentioned adoption, but finding a friend who could take in your dog would be less permanent and would basically guarantee you the ability to see the dog whenever you want and allow you to take him back when you can.
     
  10. thylvin

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    This is a difficult situation. I know. Pets, they grow on you, they crawl into your heart like it's no man's business. I guess mainly it's due to the fact that they can't really talk back at you. Mostly it's also the idea that they listen to you when your sad or angry or just feel like sharing. They don't criticize, they don't get angry or anything. They are loyal and they are friends.

    Having said that it's really up to you. You are close to the dog, but you won't be able to care for him/her. Neither do the people you know. Adoption is usually the next best thing, but be careful when entrusting a person with your friend. That's all I can say.
     
  11. Tetraquark

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    Very good advice so far. I would definitely take him to a vet first. If he turns out to still be in relatively good health, then you could look for someone to adopt him. If all else fails you could also look into the local animal shelters. You might not be able to see him again after he is adopted, but it would be better than putting him down (again assuming his health is otherwise decent).
     
  12. BudderMC

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    Thanks for the continued advice guys.

    See, I'm worried though that if he were to find another family, he'd just be sad and mopey the whole time. It's pretty obvious he misses our dad still, and it's been 9 months... I dunno, I know nobody can really know, but does anyone have insight?
     
  13. BudderMC

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    Turns out we're gonna have to put him down. The medication is helping a bit, but would likely have to be ramped up and right now is already too expensive for my mom to be able to afford each month... not to mention like any other arthritis, even though it helps with the condition the patient is still in some sort of pain. I don't want him to suffer, so I guess I've come to terms with it.

    I feel like I should be sad, but I can't bring myself to be sad. I don't know if that's just because of the little time I've seen him over the last couple years, but I hope it's not because I'm repressing stuff...

    Tentative date is Friday, so I'll probably be venting here again soon. :/
     
  14. King

    King Guest

    Aww, BudderMC. <3
    I'm sorry your dog has to be put down, and it sounds stupid, but just know it's for the better. He won't be in pain anymore. I know the pain of a pet being put down, and it sucks, but it's great to know that they won't be hurting anymore. :slight_smile:
    Good luck, and EC is always here for you! <3

    King xxxxx
     
  15. PerfectInsanity

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    I'm so sorry that you have to be put in this situation. Have you looked into a rescue agency for that particular breed? Our last dog my parents adopted was from a rescue agency and I remember there being older dogs than her available. You might be able to find someone willing to care for your dog provided that the hip problems are not too advanced.

    You said that the distance you've had lately from the dog might make it easier to deal with, but honestly, don't be surprised if it rips you up more if he is put down (you probably are repressing the emotions to some extent to deal with the possible impending death). The dog we had from the period between my 1st grade and almost high school graduation (he lived to be 12 yrs. old) had hip displaysia for about 7 of those years and my parents shelled out the money for medication to alleviate his pain. But, he ended up dying of cancer. The death really put me in a depressed mood, because for me I viewed it symbolically as a kind of "end of innocence". Yes, pets aren't humans, but they've been domesticated enough through the eons that they are pretty damn close to having human characteristics. Dealing with the loss of them is just as difficult.

    Hang in there!(*hug*)(*hug*)
     
  16. Mlpguy88

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    I'm sorry (*hug*)
     
  17. awesomeyodais

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    Sorry to hear about your best buddy. Whatever the outcome, deep down he knows you're doing what's best for him because you love him. :icon_sad:

    And don't be afraid of being sad. Allow yourself to be sad. To cry. Buckets. It's ok. Maybe his last gift will be to help you get in touch with some feelings you've been repressing as you hinted at. And for that you will be eternally grateful to him.
     
  18. bob94

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    My mom has worked at a vet clinic for over ten years. Sometimes when somebody wants to put a dog/cat to sleep, but the veterinarian thinks that the animal isn't in that bad of shape, they will refuse to do it. How serious is you dog's condition?
     
  19. thylvin

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    I am so sorry to hear that. (&&&)
     
  20. Revan

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    I'm sorry man...I lost my Jack Russell Scout last March (2011), to this day I still think of him and miss him tons. You'll make it through, but I'm sorry you're losing him :frowning2: <3