Safe-sex, ED, and Testing

So I am just posting an update on life and kind of looking for some feedback.

So I have been exploring my sexuality the past half a year and having fun doing so until I realized I am on a little bit much of a rush. In other words I consider I have become a little too sexually active. I went from not having sex for a couple years since I broke up with my ex girl -- to having many small flings with guys since I accepted and started exploring my bisexuality.

Problems are;

I think I have ED

Because I have ED I have engaged in some stupid activities.

Lemme expain...

So when I was with my girl I had signs of ED (I was with her for years) and I thought it was because I was gay and just not actually attracted even though I very much enjoyed sex -- I thought the sometimes lazy member was due to my body trying to explain I am not attracted.

Then I moved onto exploring men and guess what -- same prob! I also enjoy the sex on the same level (maybe a little bit less, but that`s because I find it harder to have sex with a guy when I am not at full mast, as it is with a girl).

Where does the stupid activities come in. Well I am pretty desensitized and after reading some posts on here an reddit and all over the internet (including blogs, personal stories, etc) I have come to realize I think I have been masturbating with porn too much for far too long. So my penis is desensitized, my brain is desensitized etc. Now because of this when I have sex with condoms (men and women) I can`t keep it up. With my ex it was okay cause we were exclusive.

With these guys it`s different.

For the most part I have had sex with condoms and although it wasn`t that great -- see ED issue for the reason -- it was atleast safe. But I recently had a guy I hooked up with who on two occasions I did not use protection. I did so because I was able to keep it hard and actually have good sex.

Is that worth my health.... hell no!

So I have started on a mission to do nofap which I am hoping will help... so in the future I can use condoms and have no issue. Btw, I did it for a week and then hooked up with guy and I could already feel a difference but it wasn`t enough to work with condom still so I didn`t have sex. Is there anyone out there who has attempted or been successful with a reboot and no fap.

I have decided as of today to take it seriously including no more hookups. I have scheduled a testing for next friday to make sure I am in the clear too and hopefully can make more responsible decisions going forward.

But if anyone out there has any feedback on nofap, ed recovery from this, testing anxiety or anything else I touched on I would greatly appreciate it. Sometimes the words of others make a huge difference

Cheers guys

 

Thanks for the wise words guys.

Atticus --

I considered speaking to the doctor about the potential ED when I go this time but then I decided against it. Doctors in the past have been too quick to push medication which I am not a huge believer in so I don`t wanna be put in that situation.

I had issues with anxiety attacks when I was younger and like my mother they wanted me to take medication to get through them but because of the side effects my mother had I refused. Long story short a lot of that was stuff I had to work out within myself and did without medication. I don`t want to be tempted with a quick fix and because I think most of my problem is prob mental and desensitization I think I will try first to work it out on my own.

TheEdend -- the whole issue with condoms and me is that I literally can`t feel anything with them. Before anyone jumps on the bandwagon about this because I have posted about this before.... No there is no condom that makes a difference, no it doesn`t make a difference to put lube on first or any of the other magic tricks... trust me I have tried EVERYTHING. I originally thought it was because I was circumcised but I have learned since then that isn`t the issue.

Also I don`t know if this is possible but I think part of the problem with condoms could be my body just doesn`t like it. It`s not comfortable for me to have one on... unfortunately they are the only option.

However, I recently have been reading about condom issues and ED issues and there is more and more of a big movement regarding desensitization and pornography especially if it is used in abundance. Because it seemed to be a fit I want to give it a try and see how it goes.

And just to clarify my issues aren`t just with condoms on; in general my erections are weak and last short periods of time and I have a hard time achieving orgasm. The time I was referring to recently where I had less trouble maintaining an erection was when I started trying to go without porn and masturbation. During that time, other than when I tried the condom I stayed hard much longer and much harder. Unfortunately I got all excited though the problem was fixed and returned to my old habits.

The funny thing about psychology is that maybe this isn`t necessarily the issue but if I change something and see progress my brain is likely to think it is related and then if there truly is a mental block there it may help it.

I don`t know if you've read anything about the nofap or no pmo thing but it is gaining quite a bit of steam from many, many people with similar situations.... so it has definitely peaked my interest.

I guess I will wait and see... however the one thing I may do is get blood work done just to test testosterone levels cause I know that can be an issue. Honestly I have little faith in the pharmaceutical industry and I don`t wanna rely on medication (not that I think it`s wrong for others, it`s the individuals choice) but for me I don`t want to become reliant on pills for ANYTHING because I have been witness to what kind of issues that causes (and yes I am one of those crazy people who doesn't even take Tylenol for a headache)