I'm in love with my best friend and I can't tell if he's straight or not...

Seeing the title, I was going to just type, "Ask him."

After reading your post, I don't think you have to ask him to know that he is gay. He may or may not be homophobic, he may or may not be in denial, but he's definitely not straight.

As for what to do about it, what with the religion and him pretending he's only joking, I really don't know. Being gay is certainly not a choice. I guess you could just go on being gay with him, joke around and say it's only until you get to college, and when you do get to college see whether he's ready to talk about it honestly.
Alternatively, you could outright tell him that you're gay and you have no choice in the matter, but say he can consider himself to be whatever he wants.

 

Being the logical person I am I have to say if he's willing say he's gay and pretty much does everything that would qualify as being gay. HE'S GAY.

The fact he doesn't put a name on it is a definition without a distinction. If he were trying to attract girls by acting gay, that's different but he obviously is gay.

He might think it's a phase like I did but it's not It's locked and cannot be changed. It's not like after high school poof your into girls it doesn't work like that.

He may not admit because of his overly religious and him saying it's a sin might just be a front to hide his feelings for you.

I suggest a Wait-And-See approach. Play along for now.

 

This seems to happen a lot. And often times we simply mistake others as being gay or even if we are correct, they can be in extreme denial. My advice is that if you want anything further, you have to say something or ask him if he is gay, etc. But there is always the possibility that it will change things for the worse or he will distance himself. Normally I would say that I think this guy is most likely gay but honestly, I have seen this happen where you become SURE they are gay and then they say they aren't and it falls apart.

I don't mean to scare you about it but you can either make a move, or let things naturally play out and not push it or you can drop it and not force anything. I would give it more time either way. Just be friends for a while and see where things go. It always makes things better. Whether you date or not, a stronger friendship is a good thing.

 

First of all Gay isn't a life style, neither is it a choice. you either born that way or your not. as for different phases, well yes I too though it was a phase back in school. look at me now, 12 years after school and I'm married a guy. if it was or is a phase... then it must be the longest phase in the history of the human history

As for the bible there are several different references to gay relationships, none of which was condemned. King David was gay before he became a king. he had a sexual relation with his best friend. there are quite a few examples like this.

 

You (or him) could be bi, you know.

 

This.

If I wasn't responding from a phone, I'd give a rebuttal to the "obviously he's gay" sentiment. For the OP, don't get me wrong, I hope you both get what you want from each other. But all the speculation often does is disappoint you.

 

Also this. It may just be better to wait a little bit. This happened to me slightly. It wasn't my crush (because he was a guy and I like girls) but I was almost sure that one of my male friends were gay. They weren't. :icon_redf

If you're feeling really confident, maybe try making a move or asking him if he's gay? However, it might just be better to wait it out and see how things go.

To me it sounds like he's pretty much gay, but remember, you can only be sure someone's gay when they actually say, "I'm gay."

 

in a perfect world this guy would be gay. sure he does all the "gay stuff" and the "gay signs" are there but i'm sure there are countless number of people here that will tell you that they thought someone was gay and it later came out that they were not or maybe they were in denial. do not get your hopes up. the best thing to do is feel him out. its clear that he is curious about being gay but his religious views (or those of his parents) would probably prevent anything from actually really happening. if you feel comfortable enough with him, maybe you could ask him a hypothetical question...."hey dude, we play around a lot, hypothetically what you do if i actually started to have feeling for you? would that weird you out?". or you can turn the same question back on him, "hey dude, we play around alot and its fun, but let's just say hypothetically if u started having real feelings for me would you feel comfortable enough to tell me or would you feel weirded out?" either way it starts the conversation without ever saying you are gay or he is gay. good luck. keep in mind the fact that he adamantly uses religion to say being gay is not right but at the same time holds your hand, cuddles with you and acts like your boyfriend....we'll it kinda shows that he is confused and that even if you find out he is gay, having a relationship with him may be hard if he is not ready to accept it.