I'm tired of being a student

I know this is cleshed but your parents only want whats best for you.

When I finished High School my parents gave me a year off to decide what I wanted and after that it was go to college or join the army. I chose college.

I'd say stick it out. It's unpleasant I know but I'd want you to do better than they did if I was your dad.

As for coming out you can still live with your folks but I'd keep the home life and the school life separate from each other. My folks don't want to admit it but anyone who asks at college I'll flat out tell them I'm gay.

It's rough I know but I think you'll be better off in the long run.

But do what makes you happy. If college isn't for you you don't have to go and you can set up an agreement with your folks to pay rent and continue working.

But if they truly love you they'll still accept you for you.

 

You said you could afford to move out if you started working full time again. If that's true, then for goodness' sake, start your job hunt immediately and start living life the way that worked for you. I don't think I have to convince you that it will make you happier.

No matter what the hopeless romantics might say, college isn't for everyone, and it isn't the only road to success. And unless you're getting your degree in a very technical field that a degree will help you break into (engineering, computer science, chemistry, pre-med, etc.) and unless you want to go into that field, statistics say that your degree itself isn't likely to have a tangible effect on your future employment gains (sure, a degree looks good on your résumé, but so does four years of work experience). The actual benefits of the four-year college experience are more along the lines of discovering who you are, exposing yourself to new ideas, making new friends, growing as a person, reveling in a subject you love, and intangibles like that. And if college is stressing you out as much as it sounds like it is, you probably aren't getting many of those benefits. In other words, you aren't getting your money's worth.

Now, when it comes to what your parents will have to say about it, most parents can exert some level of influence over their child's schooling because they're paying for some or all of it. But if they aren't paying for it, they have no right to do anything more than give you suggestions. You say you're an independent person, and you seem to want to experience that independence even more. Sometimes part of independence is doing things that those around us, even our parents, don't like, because they're the right thing for us.

Also, keep this in mind: not going to school now doesn't exclude you from going back later in life if you decide it's the right thing for you then. Especially if you're paying for it out of your own pocket, the only opportunity you'd be denying yourself is the opportunity to do it now while your mind is still fresh and malleable, but given all the stress college is causing you, it doesn't sound like it's worth it. And going to college full-time isn't your only option. You could also be a part-time student and take night classes if you do end up wanting to continue your education while enjoying the independence of working life.

As for what to tell your parents, before you have that conversation, I would advise you to secure full-time employment; you can use that as ammunition during the conversation. Once you've accomplished that, tell them what you've told us: you aren't getting your money's worth out of the experience, working makes you happier, your working lifestyle is sustainable, etc. You can also tell them that you're an adult now and you make your own choices now. And don't feel like you can't mention that they have no right to pressure you to stick with it if they aren't paying for it; hell, that's the first bomb I'd drop if I were in your shoes.

I think you know in your heart-of-hearts what you need to do, and I wish you all the good fortune in the world in following through on it. (*hug*)

 

This reminds me of the marshmellow experiment. There is one marshmellow right in front of you, right now. You can eat it now, or wait 15 minutes and get another marshmellow.

By leaving college you will find happiness right away. You will get a job, have free time, and enjoy life. However, long term, you won't find as much success, and may end up having to return to college as a mature-age student. Some could say that by leaving college you are making a bad choice because you'll end up in a low-paid job for the rest of your life, while with a college degree you will be able to get a better job and earn more money and live a better life.

In the end, it is up to you. However, I'd recommend sticking with college for now. You could become more out and open in college and try and find people you can associate with. You've only got a few years, and once those years are over, you will have more than enough money, so you can move out, enjoy your life, and not have the long-term financial strain.

 

I think you should get a job and move out. As Owen said, the financial gain from college is mostly if you have a very specific kind of degree in the field you want. And most of the other benefits of college are frankly hampered by the fact that you are living at home with your parents.

For a lot of different careers, other things may be more important than a college degree. And there is nothing wrong with working wage-earning jobs that don't require anything beyond high school. From my perspective, a lot of my friends who went to college are chronically unemployed now, whereas my friends who entered the work force right out of high school were already in jobs before the decline in the economy, and have mostly been able to maintain their employment.

You need to make the decision that is best for you. If you feel like you are going to school only because someone else wants you to, and you don't think it's the best thing, you are not going to be as invested in it as you need to be to be successful.

 

I understand how you feel. When I was in high school, I hated it except for the extra-curriculars that I was involved in. Immediately following graduation, I went straight to a four year University...that was a mistake. While I enjoyed it, I found that it would have been better for me to start at a junior college. So, I decided to take a semester off. :eusa_naug That semester turned into two. I was working, but barely making enough money to even cover the cost of gas to go back and forth to work. Finally, I forced myself to re-enroll in school and hated it. After one semester, I decided to take another semester off. :eusa_naug The longer I was out of school, the more I dreaded going back. When I started back in January, I got involved with some organizations on campus, some of them reluctantly, but I found that I enjoyed it. I liked school more. Granted, I didn't like my regular classes as much, but within these organizations, I found people who were stronger in certain areas that I am, and we could help one another. I met new people who shared common interests and that made the day go by more quickly and made it a lot more fun. :eusa_danc When the semester was over, I was already looking forward to this fall.

My advice: Keep pressing forward. I agree with a previous post. You might be happier in the short term, but eventually, you would almost HAVE to go back to school and it is harder to go back the longer you are out. Besides, think about the cost of tuition now. If you wait three, five, ten years to go back, it could be exponetially higher. We are getting to a point in the modern world that one can hardly find a job making enough money to survive without some kind of degree. In the long run, it will be better for you to persevere and earn your degree, even if it's just an Associates. While you're there, look into the on-campus organizations. They may not all appeal to you, but give them a shot. You never know...you might just like them. I've never been a very social person, mostly introverted and shy, but by getting involved and making myself meet new people, I have become happier and more outgoing. Good luck in all your endeavors!

 

I don't know if I'd go as far as to say that a degree is only needed for technical careers. It really depends on your field and where you want to work. You may not need the degree to get the job but it can really boost your pay in ways that job experience can not (once again this depends on your field and where you work). This is true for my field. They favor a degree over experience when it comes to who gets payed what

Now, I am a big proponent of people going to college but it really isn't for everyone. Based on what you've said in your post, I think you should drop out. If you don't really want to be there, chances are you won't do as well as you would have if you actually wanted to attend. If you hate it this much you may not even end up with a degree, meaning you will have wasted your time and money

You're an adult now and I think your parents should not force you to pay for something that you don't want to be involved in. It is your money and you should be able to spend it how you'd like. I would tell them something along those lines. It is your life and you have your own plans

Make sure to think about your decision carefully. Think about the future and what you'd like to do to support yourself (and how it will work out for you if you do or do not have a degree). Good luck!

 

I suggest you figure out a long term plan for yourself. Once you have that then you will know if school is needed or not. I know, easier said than done, but that is the only way you will probably succeed. School will only work out for you if it is part of your end goal. Take in to consideration the life you want to have, maybe where you would like to live, dreams and ambitions that you would like to pursue, things of that nature. If you are having a hard time deciding what interests you, maybe you could talk to an counselor at the school and take one of those aptitude tests. However, I did that and my preferences led to a career in agriculture, which is totally off base from what interests me. I guess it was just what I knew since I was raised on a farm, but there is no way in hell that I could ever see myself farming or ranching so not sure how accurate those things are. Second on my list was technology and I do like that. Good luck finding your path.

 

What kind of job are you planning to do, either with or without the degree.

Another option is to get a full time job and continue going to school part time. I did that, and moved out of my parents house. It was hard, but I was a lot happier when I moved out on my own.

College was tough for me, but I am glad I stuck it out. I work in IT and helps to be able to check that degree box when applying for a job.

 

First of all my friends, our entire lives we are students, even when your old and near the grave you'll still be a student. Why? Cause life has a funny way of throwing curve balls and turning life upside down. So the journey through that is a learning experience.

Ok as for college... the only reason you hate it, is because you are studying the wrong things. How could I say that if I do not know what you are studying? One simple answer... you're unhappy.

The real trick to a successful career is not to get into high paying jobs. All the money in the world won't do you any good if you're unhappy.

My advice to you... find something you feel happy to do, then study in that direction. then my friend you'll see you'll end up liking collage. Not sure what I mean? let me tell you a bit of my career life.

I'm a pc junky... don't laugh I really am, even since school. Well since school i figured i wanted to work with computers so naturally I got a job working as a technition. was at that job for like 4 years, working on both the Apple Mac and windows platforms. I wanted to study further, I did a few short courses, but i wasn't really happy. At the end i hated the work so much i was kinda forced to leave the work.

During that time, i've made friends with people working at advertising studios. That's what got me. So i in turn started looking for work in a studio. Didn't get that at first, but got into a huge print factory. there i learned the basics. i loved it so much that in 3 years time I worked myself to the very top of the company (well not the production managers post, but just underneath it.) I got from there into website building and maintenance... mostly cause i got into animations and websites sort of help you to understand animations and what it takes. Now today I work for the Municipality of Windhoek. I am the manager for the opperations department which handles all internal related advertising and external related advertising. i work on training videos for the city police (like a metro-police) and tv advertising for the municipality as a whole. Now I love my job to bits. See I am a creative person, i love drawing and painting. since i loved computers, putting all of them together, makes me a graphic designer with an edge. Now i am studying as I need to have a diploma or two behind my name. These don't do much much besides raising my salary. For our country I get more that what even the regular Advertising Directors get. but if i convert that to USD 3562 per month... not much on par with the international standards, but highest in my country.

What I am saying is that find something you love to do, and work towards getting payed for doing that. You will be so much more happier. Trust me.

 

Hi there. It's so sad story, friend. I've had the same problems at school. And only professional help have been my solution. Only thanks to https://pro-papers.com/gb/ I've graduated from high school. Cause it's so hard to be not like other guys. You are not killing your future if you don't finish college and you should Ijust be doing what makes you happy. Good luck, friend.