Hi all, I need your help!! So I did not come out yet but I'm planning to do so in the next couple of weeks because It has become too much stressful to keep It inside me:icon_redf. However, I have a big issue:"I'm an international student" and I have been in the USA since last January (I'm originally from Italy). In this period of time I have been making friends both male and female, but I do not really 100% trust them, I mean they are 100% open-minded and nice people but I haven't spent much time with them. .:icon_sad:. Furthermore , I have even meet a lot of gay guys but I told them that I was straight so we did not really had much conversation. So, I wanna come out but I don't know to whom... Should I come out with those few gay friend that I have met? or with my old friends back in my country? or just tell to my new friends? Help plz :help: Thanks all (&&&) P.S. Sorry about my English, I hope u can understand
Which would be more comfortable for you? Would you consider coming out to both? I wouldn't worry about having told people you were straight. I'd say most people would understand why you didn't feel comfortable telling the truth.
Your at an atvantage, you can tell your new friends. Your not american, your italian, so they wouldn't care much, though some girl might be disappointed cause now they know they can't date you. you might loose some guy friends, but those that stick around and more friends than the others. As for you home, i'd say yeah, if you feel ready for that, also your very far from you so they can get used to it before they see you again,
I do not really have preferences, I feel comfortable with either of the groups ---------- Post added 24th May 2012 at 03:42 PM ---------- Thanks for your answer It gives me a lot of positive energy (!), and I have to say that here in USA is totally another life for me, so I think I should start my "new" life here :icon_bigg
Well, that's fantastic! All you really need is to figure out when and how you want to do that. Have you given that any thought?
If you don't mind me asking, how long will you be studying in the US as an international student? I'm also on an exchange this year and I've sort of found that the fact that I'll only be here for a short time has changed the way I look about telling people (over here) about this. At the very least it's worth while telling some of the gay guys you've met. (That's sort of the route I'm taking, although I can only tell people I'm questioning considering I haven't figured that all out yet.) There's not really much risk if you want to come out to them and you could also use it as a sort of trial run for when you come out at home. You are unlikely to see any of the people you meet while on an exchange year again unless you really get on with them and want to meet them.W hich means that you will only end up seeing people who've reacted well. And as a matter of interest, as an international student do you sort of find yourself feeling a bit more adventurous being so far away from home? Because I would never even have considered coming out at home but I sort of am here. Just wondering if it's just me.
I will be study in the US for the next 5 year then I hope I can get a green card(is gonna be hard) to stay here. Anyways, I have to say that as soon as I arrived in the US and learned English my whole life has changed. My feeling and my personality itself has changed and I have been depressed , happy , lunatic etc. (I hope u know what I mean) I feel that here in the US there is more "freedom", people here are more open-minded and social then my country. Here I have been in contact we a lot gay guys, and my sexuality exploded(in a good way). As you said if I think to come out in my country... I wouldn't ( I dunno why), but here is totally different. ---------- Post added 24th May 2012 at 05:22 PM ---------- not yet.... do you have any advice?(*hug*)
It's normally preferable to tell people in person. Try to work out a way you could talk to one of them alone perhaps, by inviting them out to hang out perhaps or by pulling them aside quickly if you see each other regularly at some sort of function. If you don't think you can do that, you can try calling them, writing a letter, sending an electronic message (email, text message, what have you), etc. It's whatever you feel comfortable doing, really.
