So... in a nutshell I like this guy who I'm friends with. We met through lacrosse this season so I know him pretty well. I thought he was sending me some signals by always putting his arm around me and smiling and winking at me but then... I found out he broke up with his girlfriend this weekend. I asked him and he said it was because of personal reasons.. and it made me think, even hope, that maybe he is gay.. and just confused or something. How should I approach this?
Doesn't matter whether he's gay or not, as far as I know the general rule of thumb after someone's just out of a relationship is to give them some time and space. You don't want to be "the guy he experiments with" nor "the rebound guy". Someone with more experience can correct me on that, though. Honestly, if we look at what we've got, you have no idea if he's into guys, he's probably not up for a relationship, and he likes you currently as a friend. Signs don't really point in the "he wants to date you" category. Could it happen? Sure. But I think this is one of those cases where even if you did go ask him, it's probably better to not push it. And if he does like guys, he's probably working through accepting himself, seeing as he was just dating a girl. Again, give him some time. Does he even know you like guys?
You can discuss your own sexual orientation with him if you want to, as long as he's not uncomfortable with that. If you're attracted to him, you can tell him so. BudderMC is right about giving him some time after the breakup, though. If you're into guys, and he knows you're into guys, and you like him, and he knows you like him, then it's all right to ask him about his sexual orientation. I'd ask in an open-ended way, like, "Feel free to talk to me about sexual orientation, but you don't have to if you don't want to." Other than that, just be friends and don't even worry about whether he's gay or not. Until and unless he discusses it with you, it's none of your business.
first of all as BudderMC and Farouche said, give him some time, then maybe coming out to him or open ended questions would help, but don't fantasy about it too much, because if he is not questioning and just straight, it would heart you.
You've got this in the bag. Since your friend just broke up with his girlfriend, you can swoop it and make your move. Kidding kidding, but at the same time seriously though. It's how you get to be better friends anyways. Be chill about it and see where things go. Don't push your luck. Be observant. Most young romances happen spontaneously and naturally, not forced into. If your friend's gay and into you, you'll be able to tell in time. If you aren't sure, then just wait. Best of luck
The only thing I wanna say is that being pessimist would help you in this situation ... In order not to hurt yourself. "Personal reasons" can be referred to a lot of things! So do not day dream about him being gay. Just be honest with him and try to find out about his real orientation. Sorry for my bitterness ...
