Hi, This is my first post so please be gentle. Sorry its so long. I met my current boyfriend nearly 9 years ago, we started dating after a week and he moved in with me 5 years ago. I had previous boyfriends but none as near as this long, the last one had cheated on me so I dumped him. I am my boyfriends first boyfriend. Although I loved my other boyfriends I actually fell in love with this one and it was like I had never loved before. Overall we have been really happy together, we have never broken up and only had a couple of heated arguments. About 2 years ago I was awake one night while he was sleeping and I went to look out of the window because i heard a noise and his phone was there, it flashed up with a picture of a guys penis. Curious I picked it up and had a look, it was a picture message, I read the message and it said something like "for you baby"... I decided to have a look to see who it was and what was going on, I found that my boyfriend had sent this guy a couple naked pictures of himself. I got furious my first thought was that he is cheating and I also got angry as the day before I showed him how to set up and use the picture message!! lol So I immediately woke him and confronted him with this, he made some excuses about it being an old friend from school and it going a bit too far. I said I didn't know what I was going to do, break up or try to work through it, he started crying when I said that and promised he wouldn't do anything like that again. I forgave him and we carried on. Fast forward 2 years now till a few months ago, Everything was going great, no major issues, holidays away together etc. I then receive a message from one of our Facebook friends sending me a link to a facebook profile. I check the link and Its my boyfriend, my first thought was I haven't seen these pics... or this profile name. Then I notice the in a relationship part... that's not my name!! He had set up another profile and was posting away as he was in a relationship with some other guy! The guy was in the US but that didn't matter as I felt so hurt and betrayed! My boyfriends pictures where of him showing off his body with just his underwear on. When my boyfriend got home from work I was ready to kick him out but as soon as I saw him I started to cry so bad I could hardly speak, I showed him the profile and he started all these excuses about how he was only getting back at the guy for being mean to one of his facebook friends. After a lot of apologizing and him deleting the profile in front of me again I had forgiven him, after all he hasn't physically cheated on me. I noticed that he was getting a bit friendly with a few other guys on facebook but I took it as harmless flirting. A couple of weeks later we are ordering things from amazon and I notice his recent purchase history had about 10 items sent to one of the names of one of them guys on facebook I looked at him and at first he tried lying and saying it was his mums but I know his parents very well, I freak out, why are you buying things for this guy? He didn't have an answer for me, again it was the apologies and i'll never do it again, he deleted the profile. Then a couple of weeks later he starts getting calls on his phone in the middle of the night but he was just rejecting the calls, at first i didn't think much of it but then it got so regular that I asked him about it, he said it was some guy from facebook he has started speaking to! I question him on why he gave his number to other guys he said he had given it to a few but he would really like to chat to this one from time to time. I agree as long as it didn't go too far, but the calls got so regular his phone bill which I pay for came in at 4 times the amount it usually is. I question him and he said he didnt realise he was chatting so much to this guy and he will tell him that they wont chat as much on the phone after all he can chat on facebook as much as he wants. Then the incoming calls increased where I said ok this guy is either taking the piss as he knows your in a relationship or he is seriously trying to come between us, he said he will talk to the guy about it, the next day he said he spoke to him and the guy yelled at him saying block me if you want... so my bf did. I then said look I don't mind you chatting to guys on facebook as much as I don't like it but turn down the "leading on" and giving out your number he promised he would and now.... Another guy keeps calling him, I ask him, he said I know I promised but I really like this guy and would like to be his friend then now the guy has invited my boyfriend to visit him for a weekend and my boyfriend has agreed. He tells me the guy knows we are in a relationship and he would never try anything to change that, he has known this guy a couple of weeks tops, He calls my boyfriend on the phone and when my boyfriend isn't on facebook the guy is leaving posts saying where is ***** I miss him, my boyfriend calls him handsome all the time in his posts and the guy calls my boyfriend sexy. When I said I didn't want my boyfriend to go visit him he tells me he feels like I can't trust him! Now he has booked to go and I am at the verge of what do I do? Do i let him go and stress all weekend or do I just cut my losses and try to move on without him? Whenever I bring it up and want to tell my boyfriend that I really don't feel comfortable with him doing this he gets all moody and I feel guilty and give in. I really don't feel comfortable with it? Am I wrong? am i being over cautious? I personally respect my BF too much to flirt and give out my number to other guys never mind going to visit one I only met online nevermind for a weekend! but maybe thats just me? Please any and all advice would be awesome right now. :help: Cheers T
