Is he gay, too?

I know there are a ton of threads asking questions like this, but here it goes:

A couple of weeks ago, I went out with some of my friends and there was this reeeeally cute guy there who I hadn't met before. I could tell right away that he was very outgoing. We started off just talking about normal stuff, but as the day went on, he always seemed to want to be by me. He even touched me a couple of times (just my arm, and that sort of thing). Near the end of the night, we went out and ate, and I was the last to order my food and sit down. The only seat open was by the cutie (I was quite happy, of course). He asked me if I had a girlfriend, and I told him that I didn't. His exact words were, "that's a shame." When I was eating, he said something along the lines of "I like how you eat." I had two thoughts on this comment: he was either joking and trying to be funny, or he was being flirty. He always kept eye contact when we talked. And the day afterward, my friend told me that she went to his church with one of her other friends, and she said that he missed me.

Fast forward to last night. We are friends on Facebook, and he asked me if I wanted to go to his house for a bonfire they were having. Of course, I went. We didn't talk a ton (there were a lot of people there, and I mainly just hanged out with the people I knew). When we did talk, he was, again, very touchy (touching my arms again, and even my chest once!). When I was about to leave, I started saying bye to everyone. I went up to him to say bye, and he was in a hammock with this girl (which really made me feel depressed inside). But then he asked me to give him a hug. I leaned down and hugged him (while he was in the hammock with the girl). He then said, "that wasn't a good enough hug. You didn't even squeeze very hard." And so I hugged him again and left.

I'm sorry this is so long, but I'm really confused. It seems like I'm getting a lot of "gay" signs from him, but then there's the whole thing with the girl in the hammock. I never saw them kiss or anything, but it was dark out, so who knows. So what do you guys think?

 

Chip: I think you're right about the whole him not accepting it himself thing. I heard his brother making fun of someone they know for being gay, so it's not as if he's in a very accepting environment. I'm kind of in the same situation (my dad is very homophobic), so coming out is just so scary!!

 

That's such a great point! I myself have had a really close girlfriend (girl who is a friend lol) since 3rd grade. And on his Facebook, a lot of his pictures are him with a lot of other girls.
Again, I am similar because most of my friends are girls.

 

I've been thinking the same thing about my friend knowing about my sexuality. She's the same one who I've been friends with for so long. But the other day we were talking and she started talking about what my future wife would be like and that kind of stuff. So I think she might suspect that I'm gay. She's moving out of state in July for college, and I plan on telling her before then, because I would feel so guilty not letting her know.

Anyway, it seems like the guy at the very least likes me in a friendly way. He goes to school with my cousin, and my cousin told me, "He came up to me and was like 'I love your cousin!'" So it seems like he talks about me when I'm not around, so that's a good sign! I think I'm gonna send him a message saying something like, "So are you and that girl you were in the hammock with going out?"

 

Not much has happened, but I thought I'd give an update.
The day after the bonfire, I messaged him on Facebook:
Me: "So last night was fun, but I got bug bites all over my legs. Thanks a lot!"
Him: "my plan worked hahahahahah(evil laugh)"
Me: "You and your evil ash-covered marshmallows! So are you going out with that girl you were in the hammock with?"

My most recent message was sent on Sunday, and he still hasn't responded. I guess he either just doesn't want to answer it, or he just hasn't seen it yet. Only time will tell (trying to stay positive)!
Edit: the whole marshmallows thing was because he burnt a lot of the marshmallows.

 

Looks like you're right! He messaged me back about an hour ago saying, "Woahhh (my name), we're just close friends." At first I thought he meant that he and I were just close friends, and then I realized what he meant. There's still hope :icon_bigg

 

Just thought I'd update everybody. Not much has happened, but yesterday we sort of had a conversation on Facebook. My friend put a status update, and I was teasing her in the comments. Here's how the discussion went (I'll take their names out):
Friend: You're a Loser lol
Crush: lol
Me: Don't "Lol" at her!! She's abusive to me!
Crush: lol soory bobby
Me: ...You're forgiven...
Crush: thks booby
Me: Now YOU'RE verbally abusing me! Calling me booby...jeez
Crush: lol sorry again booby
Friend: Dont take that verbal abuse (his name)..not right. You should be ashamed of yourself booby!
Friend: Dont take that verbal abuse (his name)..not right. You should be ashamed of yourself booby!
Crush: lol tht does sound better booby lol
Me: Heard you the 1st time, (her name)!
Friend: My phone messed up and did that. Now what's your excuse for messing up my name?
Me: Times like these remind me why I hate my name. Well, you're kind of a mess up, (her name), so I thought it was appropriate.
Crush: (her name) u know what to do to booby lol
Me: And what would THAT be??? Have you been scheming?
Friend: What's that (his name)? Do please remind me, there's all this jiberish that has to do with a guy named booby on my wall..so weird.
Crush: lol (her name) u make me laugh

Eventually, I'll probably ask him if he wants to hang out (if he doesn't ask me first). When we're both on Facebook, I so badly want to talk to him, but don't really know what to say. I just want to take things slowly and make sure he's gay before I tell him anything. I've read a few similar threads on this site, and not all of them have ended the way people wanted them to, so I really want to be sure before I tell him. Thank you guys for your advice & opinions

 

The church girl and the friends since 3rd grade girl are the same person . I'll admit, I acted uncomfortable when he would touch me in front of a bunch of people because I'm "not out at all." But when there weren't many people around, I just smiled and let him do it. I think I might be giving him mixed signals, so that's something I'll have to work on. You're right, it's my turn to make the next move. The sooner the better. I'll have to think of something and (hopefully) send him a message tomorrow. Thank you

 

Well I just came out to my friend. Here's how it started: She told me I needed to socialize more, and said that I should get ahold of my crush. This made me think that she knew something, so I told her that I had something really important to tell her, and I told her. She asked me if I was joking, and when I told her I wasn't, she told me that she loved me and didn't see me any differently. We talked for about an hour, and she asked me if I had anyone that I liked. I told her about my crush. She told me that she used to like him, too! I asked her if she thought he was gay, and she said that she thought he might be. So she basically just knows as much as I do. I told her that I want to hang out with him, but it would be awkward if it were just the two of us, and I asked her if she would come, too. She said that she's down with that.

Wow. I'm still in shock that I actually told somebody. When I woke up this morning, I never thought that this would be that day. So that's how my life's going now. Pretty good start

Oh, and earlier today, my crush commented on my new profile pic (I was wearing glasses, which I don't normally wear). He said: "Dang, booby " Today was a good day.