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Mixed signals... :/

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Destiny, Jun 3, 2012.

  1. Destiny

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    So, I like my best friend. She has given me a few signs she feels the same.

    She used to lean her head on me and lean on my and stuff like that. But, she stopped because before, I would react badly...before I even realized I wasn't straight lol

    She sits close by me, tells me to lay close to her cuz there was bumps on the ground beneath me.

    We laugh and smile at everything the other says. We also hug each other.

    We used to jokingly act like we were gay towards each other.

    She texted me a chain letter saying Today is claim a sexy person day and babe I own you!

    I said my back was hurting and she started to lightly rub my back. (which caught me by surprise)

    She said how we are so close and comfortable around each other and how we would never be like that with any other friend. (*hug*)

    But, I made a hint/joke about being more than friends, and she quickly turned around, had a bad surprised look on her face...I played it off as a joke and she still had the look and said I wouldn't know what to do if you were serious... :/ :confused:

    And, I once gave her a birthday gift and the bag had hearts on it. She made a big deal about it and was like "you would give your sis something with hearts on it? I don't even give my own sister hearts" But, she had a smile on her face the entire time.

    She also occasionally talks about guys, and mentioned a guy she had a huge crush on. And, she asks me what I think of certain guys...as in looks I guess...and she won't take I don't know for an answer lol

    I hate it because she doesn't know I'm a lesbian, I don't know if she's straight or bisexual, she gives me signals she likes me but then the opposite, I feel like I'm lying to her because I try to hide it. I feel like she wouldn't want to know because it could ruin our friendship. Or make it really awkward... Her friendship means a lot to me.

    Oh, and we say how we're like sisters because of how close we are...which is also confusing considering I like her...haha Is that weird? :confused:

    Also, it's pride month and how can I be proud of who I am when I go out of my way to hide it? :/
     
  2. rainbowfox

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    well things you mention as signs can be only friendship signs, don't confuse your self with guessing.
    lets list things which can happen
    1) coming out to here: a) if she is straight, well she is a really sweet friend, and if you come out to here even it can improve your friendship, she will be the one who you shared your deepest secret, the most hidden part of your identity :slight_smile: b) if she is lesbian/bi maybe a relationship form between you two (sound like fairy tales to me :slight_smile: )

    2) not coming out to her: this will just confuse you, and being in such close friendship with here will cause two things, a) day by day you get more and more concerned about her, day by day a bigger affection will be created which can heart you really bad (I had this experience) b) and the other thing which will heart more, is by your confusion your friendship will get cloudy, this confusion can cause great amount of tension between you two ( I've been there too and lost a good friend)

    so I think the best thing to do is coming out to her :slight_smile:
    you don't have to do it right now, but do it as soon as you think you are able to :slight_smile:
    and last thing to say, visit EC as much as possible, lots of us here had/have same experiences here, you may find some useful advice her :slight_smile:
     
  3. Destiny

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    I did and the next day told her that I liked her and she told me she felt the same ^_^ It's still up in the air on whether or not we can be in a relationship or not. We really want to but it's kinda up to our parents, sadly...
     
  4. rainbowfox

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    wow I'm really happy for you (*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*) (!)(!)(!)
     
  5. Lark

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    Wow, this is almost like a fairy tale! Congratulations! Here's to you two getting together :grin:
     
  6. Destiny

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    Thank you :grin: (!) We're both thrilled to finally be together :grin: (*hug*)
     
  7. Lcars

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    Oh this made me too happy to not comment! Congratulations so much!! That must be just like a dream:grin: