I was going to mention that it's already 3:30, then I realized I'm not PST... :lol: DON'T BE SCARED! It's awesome that you're going! The fact that you've made the decision to go means you really do want to go. And when you do go, all you're doing is telling yourself that your desire to go is greater than your fear of going. You can go to the group too and not come out, right? If you don't feel like coming out, then don't! I'm sure within that group of people (of all groups) they'd understand the most about not wanting to disclose that information. It's gonna go fine. Don't even worry about it. What've you got to lose?
um...lose that wonderful reputation as they think I'm a straight, virginal, very female, Christian, righteous, think homosexuality is gross icky and sinful, and so much more! they will find out their assumptions were highly inaccurate, except for going to church part, all wrong.
Go! That will be great! You can do it! You will make great friends, and you will have people to go to pride with. Pride is so much fun! Sometimes, it's okay to be scared. Just go anyway! Let them see that you are scared, too--they will help you. Everyone is scared when we are first coming out, and it's okay, no one will think anything bad about you for it. Good luck!
But if that's not who you are, why do you want to hold that reputation? It's "safer", sure, but is it being honest with yourself? I'm not trying to pressure you into doing that, but one of the big things about being closeted is lying to people... right? So why care about what they think you "are", when it's actually who you "were"?
and that is why i am accepting who i am as i hate lies. i believe the devil is father of all lies, so acting constantly the part of what others assume on me is wearing thin...which is why i can't consciouniously wear any female clothes from a girls section. it is just material...i am just as much me in any garb, but it lies...it says i am happily feminine, and i am very much not a female...effeminite? eh...if i am a bit, oh well! ---------- Post added 7th Jun 2012 at 01:14 PM ---------- so...just got call from my buddy, she and her baby are gonna meet me in 45 min. her hubby is sick. she will hang 1 hr, and drop me off at clark at 3, so...hehe I'm going to come out today. but i don't think to her, as she mentioned she will have her friend too, and likely a church friend. very religious pentacostals.
I was scared the first time that I went to my school's LGBT group as well. I'm glad that I want though because everybody there was accepting and I could talk to them. It was nice for me to have a support group IRL that I could talk to. Good luck, I hope that it goes well for you!!
hi im on my cell. i made it to last 15 min. it was not scary and only 3 people today. i saw 2 on bus so faces i may see again after school ends. i didnt know one guy is trans but he said he was. i dont know ftm or mtf! one more meet next week. i didnt say what i am but they now know im not an enemy! it felt safe there. i will go next week. maybe tell them more abt me. and i think doingthis today made me not fear going to Pride even alone and i can go to my next school and try their Queer club and not be afraid. btw i prayed God be with me. must have worked. Bible says fear not im with u. so i went Queer with God and ignored stupid fear. im gladi overcame it.
I'm glad to hear that it went well!! The fear is really hard to overcome at first, but as you go more you will become more comfortable.
Congrats it worked out fine! There could be new friendships with the two you saw on the bus too which is never a bad thing, hopefully you'll definitely be able to share more as you get used to being there.
update already: on bus home, as i walked slowly in the sunshine and enjoyed my victorious conquering of my mortal enemy Fear, guess who was on my bus? yep, that same shy transgender guy! so i say, HI! and start up a conversation right on the bus. and we talk about my tomato plants i got to get in the ground before they die completely, and he said he planted an Asian pear tree, and both of us are leaving to university, me DC him Idaho..yeah Idaho...and anyways I joke guess our moms get to enjoy caring for our stuff eating it too. I got him to giggle. I warned him my mom was born shy and so was a friend i once had, both have since become more outgoing...got to if you hang out with me. made him laugh again. cool, so i got the start of my first almost out friendship and it only took a few minutes. maybe one day i can make it a plan to befriend as many shy transgender people as i can and get them all to giggle and be happy.
